The Thought Locker: Best Movie Quotes Ever Edition

I was struggling with writers block this weekend, and while I was sitting at the computer trying to form coherent thoughts, random quotes from some of my favorite movies just started popping into my head. So I ended up on IMDB (Internet Movie Database, for the unacquainted) searching for one quote in particular, and in the process got so inspired I decided to dedicate an edition of the "Thought Locker" to my favorite movie moments.

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My first random thought was a about a recent interview I watched with a hockey player (I'll let you guess which one) that made me think about one of the most hilarious moments in Bull Durham.

Crash Davis: It's time to work on your interviews.

Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: My interviews? What do I gotta do?

Crash Davis: You're gonna have to learn your clichés. You're gonna have to study them, you're gonna have to know them. They're your friends. Write this down: "We gotta play it one day at a time."

Ebby Calvin LaLoosh: Got to play... it's pretty boring.

Crash Davis: 'Course it's boring, that's the point. Write it down.

Of course, Bull Durham, while ostensibly a sports movie, also qualifies as a romantic comedy. And why not, with great moments like this (slighted edited for content reasons).

Crash Davis: After 12 years in the minor leagues, I don't try out. Besides, uh, I don't believe in quantum physics when it comes to matters of the heart.

Annie Savoy: What do you believe in, then?

Crash Davis: Well, I believe in the soul....the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft-core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet kisses that last three days. [pause]

Crash Davis: Goodnight.

Annie Savoy: Oh my.

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Of course, my favorite movie about relationships is Say Anything. Cameron Crowe is a genius, John Cusack is just...well...my ideal guy, and the soundtrack set the standard by which all movie soundtracks since are measured. Plus, this little treasure speaks volumes of truth about relationships.

Lloyd Dobler: I got a question. If you guys know so much about women, how come you're here at like the Gas 'n' Sip on a Saturday night completely alone drinking beers with no women anywhere?

Joe: By choice, man.

Lloyd Dobler: [after leaving the Gas & Sip guys] That was a mistake.

*****

D.C.: Lloyd, why do you have to be like this?

Lloyd Dobler: 'Cause I'm a guy. I have pride.

Corey Flood: You're not a guy.

Lloyd Dobler: I am.

Corey Flood: No. The world is full of guys. Be a man. Don't be a guy.

***

Diane Court: Nobody thinks it will work, do they?

Lloyd Dobler: No. You just described every great success story.

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For a lot of people, Indecent Proposal reeked of ick factor when it came out. After all, you're talking about a woman who pretty much ruins her marriage by sleeping with a rich guy. Now if that isn't a theme straight out of Hollywood culture, I don't know what is. But she does it to get she and her husband out of debt, and the husband is complicit in the deal, so there are bigger questions posed. And certain guys I know would actually encourage their wives to bang Robert Redford if given the chance. But when you get past the "Pretty Woman with more sleaze" aspect of the movie, some of the dialogue is actually pretty moving.

David: I thought we were invincible. But now I know that the things that people in love do to each other, they remember. And if they stay together, it's not because they forget. It's because they forgive.

John: I remember once when I was young, and I was coming back from some place, a movie or something. I was on the subway and there was a girl sitting across from me and she was wearing this dress that was buttoned clear up right to here, she was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. And I was shy then, so when she would look at me I would look away, then afterwards when I would look back she would look away. Then I got to where I was gonna get off, and got off, the doors closed, and as the train was pulling away she looked right at me and gave me the most incredible smile. It was awful, I wanted to tear the doors open. And I went back every night, same time, for two weeks, but she never showed up. That was 30 years ago and I don't think that there's a day that goes by that I don't think about her, I don't want that to happen again. Just one dance?

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But without a doubt, my favorite movie quote of all time comes courtesy of a little gem called The Big Chill. Because while I'm a hopeless romantic, I'm also a realist. And this is about as real as it gets.

Meg (about men): They're either married or gay. And if they're not gay, they've just broken up with the most wonderful woman in the world, or they've just broken up with a bitch who looks exactly like me. They're in transition from a monogamous relationship and they need more space. Or they're tired of space, but they just can't commit. Or they want to commit, but they're afraid to get close. They want to get close, you don't want to get near them.