A Life Less Ordinary...

The New Plan

2012-01-30T08:03:00.000-08:00

I've become frustrated with my life lately.

Wait, let me rephrase that. I have a great life in so many ways I don't want to sound ungrateful for everything I have. My frustration is really about my inability to DIRECT my life more effectively. For a while now, I've been drifting from idea to idea, project to project, just sort of dabbling in things without a true purpose. I make lists of all the things I want to accomplish -- all the fantastic ideas I have -- and here they sit, stuck on a list, while I get distracted by all the little details of life. Some of those details ARE important, but many are nothing more than excuses not to pursue the things I want.

Lately, the cycle of my day has been fighting to get out of bed, pushing myself through a work day, coming home and working on lots of random "things" but not accomplishing very much, then spending some happy time with the people I love trying to forget about my frustration and falling into bed still thinking about it. Not a cycle for success, to say the least.

In trying to understand where my efforts break down, I kept coming back to organizational issues in my day. I had wonderful lists of things to accomplish, but how was I organizing the TIME I applied to those ideas? I went back through days I've had recently that I considered "successful" versus those that were not (keeping a diary helped tremendously with that process) and mapped out how I spent my time during those days. The process involved some frank conversations with myself about my strengths and weaknesses in terms of motivation hour-to-hour during the day. What I soon realized is that I wasn't accomplishing more because my day wasn't structured in a way that played to my strengths.

This flipchart has absolutely NOTHING to do with the structure of my day

So I set out to divide my day into sections of time based on a realistic assessment of my energy and motivation levels and put the things I need and want to do each day into those time buckets. Now I envision my day in these 5 stages.

Awakening
It's more than just getting up and heading to work or out to start the weekend. For me, my most creative thinking happens in the morning, but until now I haven't taken full advantage of that energy. Most mornings, I get up, have some breakfast, check Facebook, check the web feeds I follow, read e-mail, etc. and then head to work. From now on, most of that "stuff" is getting parked in another portion of my day because I don't need creative energy to do it. Mornings will be my time to create when I have a clear head, before everything that happens during the main part of my day clouds my priorities and muddies up my thoughts.

Accomplishing
I was initially tempted to call this section "Work." I guess that shouldn't be a surprise since we spend a huge portion of our lives working, but I stopped myself for a couple of reasons. I wanted this structure for my day to function 7 days a week, and luckily I don't work on the weekends. I also wanted this portion of the day to reflect all the things I'm doing to move my life forward. It might be job related, or it could be completing a list of tasks needed to plan a vacation. The difference here it that my efforts are not purely creative, but they do advance the rest of my life agenda. And on a lighter note, "Work" also doesn't end in "-ing" and I wanted some nice symmetry in my naming structure.

Re-Energizing
We all get to that point in the day when our energy starts to wane. In my case, it normally starts about an hour before I leave work, yet I still have a big chunk of my day in front of me and I don't want to waste it. Dedicating some time to getting re-energized will ensure I have the motivation to finish the day strong. When I was maintaining a better exercise regime, I always found a quick cardio session right after work got me back in the swing of things. Some days, a power nap might do the trick. Maybe it's a cup of coffee or some quiet time. Whatever it is, the goal is to chase away the afternoon lag and get ready for the rest of the day.

Interacting
Most of the social aspects of my day happen in the late afternoon and evening, so this category just made sense. These things don't take much creative or mental energy, and they're usually enjoyable, so they work better in the later part of the day when my overall energy level is starting to level off (I used to try and create during this portion of the day -- no surprise why I wasn't getting anything created). Social outings, time with friends and people I love, Facebook and other social media, website feeds, reading, TV, etc. And of course, the occasional hockey game.

Reflecting
If this plans works like I think it can, I'll have plenty of things to look back on at the end of each day and feel good about. Giving yourself a pat on the back is important. It's also critical to check in with yourself about what worked and what didn't during the day so you can plan on how to attack it tomorrow. It's like balancing your checkbook -- what did I spent? What did I get in return? If the numbers balance, it's been a good day. If you're in the black, so much the better.

The OCD portion of my personality was tempted to allot actual TIMES to these blocks (e.g. Awakening is 2 hours) but I realized that is also part of my problem. Each day has different demands, so the amount of time I spend in each segment of my day needs to remain flexible in order for the system to work. The key is simply to integrate each component of this plan into my day.

Writing this post was my "Awakening" for the day. Time to get going on the rest of the plan.

Searching For Something? Stop Seeking And You Will Find It

2012-01-29T10:12:00.000-08:00

During the week before Christmas, I was frantic. Trying to wrap up things at work, packing to go back home to the East Coast, finishing last minute gift arrangements -- and desperately trying to get my Christmas cards addressed.

I'm normally pretty good about keeping my address book updated during the year. I even have a special address list for Christmas cards built into my contact file. But I was running around like a mad woman looking for one address in particular, one that was printed on the return envelope of a thank you card I'd received from a friend. I remembered putting the card in a pile of paperwork I was sorting through on a business trip in early December. The pile of paperwork was gone, but the address wasn't updated in my contact file. Had I thrown it away by mistake? Left it at the hotel? Stuck it in the corner of another purse I was using?

I hunted and hunted and just couldn't find the darn thing. At 3 AM before my flight left for Philadelphia, I finally gave up looking and planned to contact my friend and ask for the address again.

I have a pile of books I've been meaning to read for quite a while, and on my longer plane rides the past couple of months I've packing a book to pass the time. When I boarded the flight to Philly I slept for the first couple of hours, then woke up with two more hours in a plane seat, unable to sleep. So I pulled out the latest book on my list -- the one I had taken all the way to Cleveland for a business trip and never opened.

As I flipped open the cover, a smile of recognition came over my face. Inside was the envelope I'd been desperately searching for -- right where I put it AFTER I finished the other pile of paperwork so I wouldn't lose it.

Sometimes we get so busy in our lives we forget the things we need are right under our noses. The next time you're frantically trying to find something, stop looking and relax. It will find you right when you need it.

Confessions of a Sick Mind

2012-01-25T17:47:00.000-08:00

All kinds of crazy things go through my mind when I'm sick with a cold. Maybe it's the drugs. Maybe it's the way my psyche handles feeling out of sorts. Either way, it's nutty and I'm confident enough in myself to share my nuttiness.

Here's a small sample of my brain waves from the last 24 hours. Enjoy while I go back to bed...

If there was a nasal use approved version of Drano Pipe Snake available, I'd buy stock in it right now.
Green is a beautiful, natural color. Just not when it comes in the form of snot and mucus.
I'm glad engineers are making progress on self-driving cars, because driving and sneezing/blowing your nose are ideally NOT activities that should be done together.
No makeup and Eau De Vicks Vapo-Rub is very sexy.
When your local pharmacy drive thru has a wait longer than Taco Bell at 2AM on a Saturday, you know you're surrounded by lots of sick people.
When it's 70 degrees and you're wearing a coat, you MUST be sick.
Do germs have feelings? If so, they're probably offended we refer to our colds with terms like "rotten" and "nasty." Maybe if we used words like "cute," "cuddly" and "nice" the germs would treat us better.
If gravity can make parts of my body sag when I DON'T want them to, why can't it drain my nose when I NEED help?

New Year, New Outlook

2012-01-23T09:06:00.000-08:00

In the last few years, I've never seen the New Year holiday as much of a cause to celebrate. Instead of being a chance to look forward to the opportunities the next 365 days present might, it's always felt more like a mulligan for all the things I DIDN'T accomplish.

The truth of the matter is that no new year -- or any other stage of our life for that matter, starts with a completely clean slate. We always carry over some remnants of our previous experiences into the new ones. This year, I'm finally at peace with the idea that it may not be a bad thing.

I've always believed who we are is the sum of our collective experiences -- successes and failures, adventures and routines. If you believe that everything in your life happens to you for a reason, there really never is a need for a clean slate, because sweeping away all the old things takes away a huge part of what you are. Instead, the new year is a celebration of the next annual chapter in your life story. It's the next stage of your evolution into the person you will ultimately become.

So this year, for the first time in a long time, I'm full of excitement about what the coming year will bring. There will be a lot of challenges to face and some big changes ahead, but I'm ready. I'm just getting started a couple of weeks late, but that's OK. Better late than never, right?

Here's to a fantastic 2012!

Hot And Cold

2012-01-04T08:21:00.000-08:00

I just got back from a really wonderfully holiday vacation on the East Coast, surrounded by friends, family, my favorite sport (that would be hockey) -- and some really chilly weather.

I was feeling nostalgic walking the streets of Philadelphia yesterday, bundled up against the cold holding gloved hands with my boyfriend, walking to lunch at a local pizza place. The crispness of the air and clear sunny sky made me feel happy and alive. I realized I missed winter.

This morning, back in Los Angeles, I checked the weather forecast. Then checked it again. It's January, right?

I know this is sunny Southern California and all, but maybe Mother Nature could tone it down just a little. Then again, I can put the top down on the car later....

My Christmas Card Inspiration

2011-12-22T10:00:00.000-08:00

In this digital age we live in, I know a lot of people have given up on sending holiday cards.

Thankfully some of my friends still like them!

I'm not one those people, and designing my annual card is one of my favorite things about the holiday season. It's fun to look through photos of all my adventures from the year and decide which ones tell the stories I want to share with my friends and loved ones in printed form.

This year many of my adventures were made more special because I got to share them with my boyfriend Paul. He loves taking pictures as much as I do, and he even served as photographer on some of my favorite shots. Since he's such an important part of my life, I wanted him to be involved in the design of the card, so I asked him to choose his favorite picture of me to be the "cover shot."

I'm not including the photo or a shot of the finished card here so it will be a surprise to those that receive it, but I wanted to share the the story behind the photo he chose. Hopefully I can paint the picture well enough with words that you can visualize it for now.

Paul and I met over a year ago but didn't "officially" start dating until February. Then in April, he made his first trip all the way from New York to visit me in California. The photo he chose was taken during that trip, on a visit to the Santa Monica Pier on a gorgeous spring afternoon. It was a breezy that day, and random curls of my hair kept flying in my face or up in the air, ruining his perfectly planned shot. Every time he saw a hair out of place, Paul stopped, walked over to me and put it carefully back in place. After numerous trips back and forth without a photo, I warned him that fighting Mother Nature AND my hair was probably more than any one person could handle, but he was undeterred. When he finally got the shot he wanted, he looked at his camera and smiled. Then he smiled back at me.

I was happy Paul chose that shot, because thinking about the moment it was taken reminds me all over again why I fell in love with him. Everyone wants to feel special, and he gives me that feeling every day, in big and small ways. My holiday card is one small way to celebrate that and hopefully give some of that feeling back to him.

Now to find some inspiration for the addressing and mailing....

Beating The Holiday Rush, Apple Style

2011-12-21T17:35:00.001-08:00

Not everyone digs the cult that Steve Jobs built. Some people feel Apple products, while well designed, are overpriced. They don't always play nicely with non-Apple products. They upgrade models a lot, making you feel like you're constantly having to spend a lot of hard earned coin to have the latest and greatest in toys.

Steve Jobs never cared about those concerns. Apple still doesn't. But Apple has a thriving business because when you DO choose to become their customer, they think about what you want and they give it to you.

For evidence of that philosophy, look no further than my Apple store shopping experience 5 days before Christmas. The store I went to was PACKED with people, but Apple knows how to handle that.

They put the most popular items right at the front of the store in a special express purchase section. No WADING through crowds.
Payments are completed with hand held card readers -- right where you stand. NO WAITING in line at a register.
Receipts get emailed to you, including gift receipts if you need them.
I was in and out of the store in 10 minutes -- less time than it took to park the car.

This is why I'm a happy and loyal Apple customer. Join the cult and enjoy your holiday.

Pearl Harbor

2011-12-07T22:11:00.001-08:00

My first visit to Hawaii was April 2003 for a friend's wedding. Since my father was a World War II veteran, a visit to Pearl Harbor was at the top of my must-see list in Oahu -- right behind dipping my toes in the water on Waikiki and enjoying a Mai Tai at Duke's Barefoot Bar.

Many of my friends had visited Pearl Harbor before me, so I had gotten great advice on what time of day to go and other logistics when I started planning my trip. But nothing anyone can tell you about a visit to this sacred place prepares you for how you feel being there.

I visited Pearl Harbor on a cloudless sunny day, much like it was on the day the attack occurred. Standing at the visitors center and looking across the water where the remains of the USS Arizona lay waiting for me, I couldn't help but think how unfair it is that the universe operates on a system of balance, blending breathtaking beauty with unthinkable horror in the same moments of time.

On the boat ride out to the monument over the Arizona, you receive strict instructions on how to behave once you arrive. There is no talking while on the monument, for it is a place to contemplate the meaning of the sacrifice of the 1,177 crew members that died that day -- especially those entombed in the sunken ship below your feet.

One end of the floating memorial houses a marble wall with the names of the victims. In the eerie quiet, I read the names through a blur of tears. Talking may be discouraged, but tears are appropriate here.

On the boat ride back to the visitors center, I found myself unable to speak, and for once I was happy to be traveling alone. I am uncertain I would have found he right words to express what I felt even if there had been someone to share them with.

I thought not only of the lives that were lost directly that day, but the totality of losses sustained around the world from the chain of events that began that fateful day. Over 60 million military and civilian casualties world wide during World War II. Countless others, like my father, changed by the war forever in spite of surviving it.

On the 70th anniversary of the vicious attack on this peaceful island paradise, I think back to my visit to the USS Arizona, I think about my father and all members of The Greatest Generation that fought for the freedom I still enjoy today, and I shed tears of gratitude all over again.

What Is Your "Thing"?

2011-12-05T21:37:00.001-08:00

Whether you've given it much thought or not, you have a "thing."

Maybe it's a hobby, or a place, or an activity. Whatever it is, it makes you unconditionally happy. You have complete confidence in your ability when doing your "thing" and never second guess yourself when you're knee deep in it. The world could be falling apart around you and doing it would make you feel better, more at peace. Your "thing" makes you smile without hesitation. It lifts your spirits.

I'm reminded every holiday what my "thing" is -- wrapping gifts.

I am never happier than when I am in the midst of rolls of shiny paper, yards of metallic bows and covered with a light dusting of glitter. I'd put my gift wrapping skills up against anyone on the planet, except maybe those people that work for Martha Stewart and dream up stuff like this. I've actually tried to think of ways I could turn custom gift wrapping into a career that could keep a roof over my head. No luck so far. If you've got ideas or funding to help me out, I'm all yours.

Since I had an attitude in need of some adjustment this evening, I was glad to have some gifts that needed wrapping. Now I feel much better after spending some time doing my "thing."

What's your "thing?" And why aren't you making yourself happy and doing it RIGHT NOW?

Heart of Iron

2011-12-01T11:42:00.001-08:00

Some people have a harder road through life than others.

Imagine your life if you started fighting cancer at age 18. You go three rounds with Hodgkin's disease and beat it all three times. At 26, you discover the chemotherapy used to fight the Hodgkin's gave you leukemia, so you beat that too. But the chemotherapy gave you something else too -- cadiomyopathy -- which weakened your heart to the point where you need a transplant. You wait 5 long years to get your new heart.

So now you're 35 years old and healthy for the first time in almost two decades. You should finally be able to relax on the couch and do nothing but enjoy being alive after all that, right?

Not if you're Kyle Garlett.

If you're Kyle, you endure all those years of fighting cancer, get your new heart and promptly start training to tackle The Ironman World Championship. Then you do it a second time -- because you can.

Kyle's tells his story in his new book Heart of Iron: My Journey From Transplant Patient to Ironman Triathlete.

Before reading it, I knew some of Kyle's story because I am lucky enough to know Kyle personally and privileged to have had small "walk-on" roles at important moments in his life. Witnessing his excellent choice to marry my friend Carrie was my favorite -- and I still cry every time I think about that beautiful moment. In some ways, reading the book was hard because I constantly thought about the suffering Kyle endured in a more personal way than the average reader. I needed an entire box of Kleenex to get through the book -- but please don't let that stop you from picking it up!

I wish I had the financial resources to buy a copy for every single person I know, and not just because Kyle is my friend and I want his book to be successful. Everyone should read this book because it is about more than beating cancer or conquering athletic challenges. It is a lesson in how positivity can shape your life.

Of all the wonderful moments in Kyle's book, this is the passage that I've been reading over and over for inspiration lately:

"There will always be something big and important and stressful going on in your life. It may not be as serious or debilitating as a battle with cancer, but if it's the thing most dominating your life, it's imposing. To you it is everything, and for that you need offer no apologies. But in spite of its presence, you can always choose to be happy. It is your choice to remain positive, upbeat, and focused on the good. Your attitude is entirely within your control."

I firmly believe that attitude is what kept Kyle Garlett alive through insurmountable odds. That attitude is what makes him such an inspiration to others. And that attitude is what keeps him reaching for even higher goals each and every day.

I'm rooting for him to achieve each and every one.

November Skies

2011-11-29T20:30:00.000-08:00

Driving home it moved me
The colors of the evening sky
The twilight hours painting their rosy glow across landscapes of concrete and stone
And I think of him...

He who loves the twilight the way I do
Who understands the subtlety of light as it recedes slowly through the passing evening minutes
Appreciating each moment as unique and breathtaking
Knowing how it feels to be a witness to the unfolding magic
And I want him to share this.

So I take the long way home
Climbing through the hills for a glimpse of the unfolding drama
Walking to the places we have stood together, gazing in wonder
And he is there with me.

He loves this place as I do
For in all its flawed grandeur there is an irresistible magic
Painted across the evening sky in shades of smoke, gold and indigo
He is here, always....

Kitchen Adventures: All Good Things Come From The Crock Pot

2011-11-27T17:05:00.001-08:00

The crock pot is one of the most magical tools in a a kitchen. I'm always amazed how you can throw a bunch of roughly chopped stuff in it, turn it on, leave it for an entire day and come home to something yummy to eat. The food practically cooks itself!

It's also great for office potlucks. I work with people who love to eat together and cook for each other, so I pulled out my trusty crock pot for the office Thanksgiving potluck this week past week. I wanted to bring something warm to hearty in keeping with the occasion, so I pulled out an oldie but goodie from my 1990 edition of the Milford Memorial Hospital Auxiliary Cookbook.

Crock Pot Steak - by Marian Marshall
"Steak" is a bit of a misnomer in this case, because the finished product is more similar to a beef stew. Regardless of the name, it's easy and tastes great.

1 1/2 pounds chuck or round steak
1/3 cup flour
1 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
1 large onion
1-2 green peppers
16 oz. canned chopped tomatoes
4 oz. canned mushrooms, drained
2 Tbsp molasses
3 Tbsp soy sauce

1) Cut steak into strips (I cheated on this part and bought pre-cubed beef at the store -- different shape, same result).

2) Put steak strips, flour, salt and pepper in pot. Stir well to coat steak.

3) Chop onion and green pepper. Add all ingredients to the steak.

4) Cover. Cook on high for one hour then turn to low for 8 hours.

5) Serve over rice.

Rice it great, but I LOVE biscuits and I don't have enough legitimate reasons to eat them, so I made a substitution.


Who doesn't love a nice golden brown biscuit?

The finished product served over half a biscuit at my office potluck!

If you're using a normal sized crock pot (3 1/2 quarts) the recipe is perfect as is. If you're feeding more people like me and using a larger pot, (5 quarts) you can easily double the recipe and it will still cook in the same amount of time.

So the next time you need an easy, satisfying meal for yourself or a crowd, give this a try! And if you're feeling brave, substitute chicken for the beef and let me know how it turns out....

What is YOUR favorite crock pot recipe?

Reflections On A Thanksgiving Alone

2011-11-24T15:36:00.001-08:00

When most people think of Thanksgiving, it's a group endeavor. Family and friends gather together, a huge meal is involved, football is on TV, games are played and stories get swapped. I've enjoyed plenty of those types of holidays in the past, but this year I decided to switch it up and try something different -- I went solo.

I've been on the go a lot lately, so part of my desire for solitude was simply to help maintain my sanity. But the other part was a sincere desire to spend some time reflecting on the past year and looking ahead to what is left -- which isn't a lot, at least in terms of time. Lately I've been feeling like I spend lots of time running around, always "doing" something but not accomplishing anything significant. I want that to change. So I thought spending some time alone with my thoughts would be the best way to sort through the clutter and focus on what really matters so I can get myself headed in the right direction again.

This has definitely been a year when I've learned a lot about what REALLY matters. Besides the myriad of challenges in my own life, I've seen friends lives turned upside down by terrible illnesses, family problems, break-ups, job losses -- you name it and it's probably happened this year. All of that made Thanksgiving an even more important time to reflect on the positive things that have happened this year and not get so bogged down in the things that didn't meet my expectations.

I have been blessed with a lot of positives.

This month I celebrated 17 years working for a company where I've always managed to find opportunities for growth and development, all while working with people I'm lucky to think of not only as co-workers but friends.

Thanks to the wonderfully connected digital world we live in, I was able to share my friends Thanksgiving celebrations on Facebook, chat via phone and even Skype with people I love. As a result I never once felt "alone" even though no one was with me at dinner. In fact, those connections are with me all year long, helping me stay close in spite of sometimes less than desirable geography.

I've lost people this year too, some by choice and some through terrible circumstances. As sad as it is to lose people you care about, I was reminded by a Facebook post from a friend that everyone who passes through your life contributes to your story in some way. The reason they are gone is because their part in your story has ended. I am grateful to everyone I lost for making my story a better one through their presence in my life.

I've been blessed with the constant support of the best group of friends in the world through the struggles I have experienced. They help me find the silver lining in every situation when I'm too bogged down in my own negative thoughts to see the way out of the darkness.

I am beyond blessed and lucky to have found true love in my life -- the kind that is not only romantic, but kind, supportive, steadfast, honest and true. That love is the one thing I am most thankful for this year.

My time spent reflecting turned out to be a wonderful way to spend Thanksgiving alone. And even though my path to all the things I hope to accomplish in the coming months and years is still unclear, remembering how much I have to be grateful for taught me that there is still hope for all of it to happen. And even if it doesn't, I already have what really matters.

John Mayer's Voice

2011-09-19T21:05:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since anyone has heard from John Mayer.

Several of the interviews he gave during his last tour showed a less than favorable side of his unique personality. In fact, I liked him a lot less because of those words even though I could still appreciate the brilliance of his music. Apparently so did a lot of other people, including some current and former band mates. After some public apologies, things calmed down a bit but he wisely let his music do most of the talking, hoping silence would start to repair the damage done.

More recently, I heard he was working on a new album and he always drops off the radar for a while during that process. Up until a few days ago, he had plans for two upcoming concert performances, both of which I was dismayed I wouldn't be able to attend.

When I read the news this morning that he's been diagnosed with a throat condition, it knocked me back a few steps. John Mayer doesn't have the most perfect singing voice in the world, but no one else sounds like him. Imagining the thought, even for a second, that his voice would be silenced was unbearable.

Then I heard this song on the car radio during my drive to work, and the floodgates opened and tears steamed down my face.

You see, John Mayer is not just another musician to me. He's been a huge part of my life for the past 10 years, ever since Room For Squares came on my radar. Since my first show at The Gorge in 2002, I've seen John in concert 25 times. I've cruised the Caribbean and Pacific Oceans with him. I followed him around the entire state of California for two weeks in 2006. I have three scrapbooks full of concert tickets, print interviews, photos and memories.

I became a huge fan because of that voice, and especially because of the lyrics he sang. He was the first songwriter that spoke to me as if he knew my life, understood my joy and pain, and knew my every desire ("I'll never let your head hit the bed without my hand behind it..."). And he put them all in words and set them to beautiful music.

As I was trying to find a Kleenex and not wreck the car, another thought struck me that gave me hope. Music can speak volumes without words. John already knows that.

As long as John Mayer has his mind and his heart, he'll always have a voice. And I'll always be listening to what he has to say. In the meantime, I'll be waiting patiently to hear him sing again.

Quiet

2011-09-04T18:26:00.000-07:00

Have you ever caught yourself thinking, "If I could just get some peace and quiet I'd be able to focus?"

Silence is a tough thing to find these days. Noise is everywhere around us, from the blips and beeps of our computers and smartphones notifying us of comments, updates, requests and pokes to the subtle electrical hum of refrigerators, TV's and all other other machines that make our lives comfortable. Even when we get away from the man made "noise" and "back to nature," the quiet is punctuated by the sounds of nearby living creatures, water lapping against a shoreline or the wind in the trees. It's nearly impossible to escape all sound in our physical environment.

But all these atmospheric distractions are a drop in the bucket compared to the sounds in our heads. Our internal "noise" is what really keeps us from thinking straight. Self-doubt, fear, anxiety, competing priorities, overburdened schedules, and too many demands from too many directions all chatter away in our consciousness, at times making it impossible to "hear" the positive thoughts that help us stay focused on good things.

Midnight, lock all the doors

And turn out the lights

Feels like the end of the world

This Sunday night

There's not a sound

Outside the snow's comin' down

Somehow I can't seem to find

The quiet inside my mind

"Quiet" - John Mayer

We often forget we have the ability to control the noise. Just like we can turn off the computers and cell phones and remove other physical distractions, we can remove the clutter in our heads as well. The key is taking time to listen to our inner voices and reflect on what they're telling us. Reflection is what helps us get past the noise and open up our minds to a whole host of better options for positive action.

The more thinking I've been doing lately, the more aware I am that I'm not great at reflecting. The first step in solving a problem is admitting you have one, so I'm off to a great start. Now to work on fixing it. Here are some things I'm going to try to get better at reflecting and controlling my inner "noise.'

1) Set aside time for reflection. Sunday will be my day, and I'm going to shoot for an hour to start. If it takes me more or less time than that, I'll learn as I go.

2) Remove as many physical distractions as you can. For me, the iPhone and laptops are the big ones. So if you're calling on a Sunday and I don't answer, I'm probably reflecting.

3) Take inventory of the thoughts in your head. Taking notes is helpful. A good old fashioned pen and paper will do just fine. Make a list of what you're thinking currently, what has happened in the previous week and even what you're thinking about the upcoming week.

4) Look for patterns in your thoughts. Are most of the things you're struggling with work-related? Or is it a person or relationship that's occupying your mental space? Once you identify the drivers of the noise in you head, you can figure out how to address them.

5) Acknowledge your thoughts. After you've sorted through everything in your mental inventory, write down at least one positive and one opportunity you discovered during your reflection. This gives you a place to not only start quieting the noise, but acting on the root causes of why it's in your head in the first place.

How do you spend time reflecting?

Rediscovering My Happy Place

2011-08-29T20:30:00.000-07:00

Back in January of 2004, my life was pretty much a mess. I was enduring my first career failure and changing jobs, unsure what my long term future held and debating on leaving my California life completely behind and just moving back to Delaware to start over. My dear friend Tanya saved me from making a hasty decision and dragged me to Mexico for a vacation instead, giving me a much needed break to get away from my troubles and gain some perspective.

We were using a timeshare that belonged to a friend of Tanya's, so we got the royal treatment because the resort was hoping we would buy our own timeshare. The room was enormous and included a hot tub and outdoor shower in addition to the huge bathroom inside. The resort was all inclusive, so we got used to 24 hour room service, cocktails on demand and all the other amenities paradise could offer two single ladies.

But the part I remember most was the view from our room.

When I came back from vacation and worked to piece my life back together, I remember discovering the concept of having your own personal "Happy Place." It's a place you go in your mind to relax, get away from your problems, quiet your thoughts and focus. At that moment in time, the spot I photographed from my hotel room was the happiest, most peaceful place I knew so it became the one I used. I had copies made of the photo and hung one on the wall I faced in my office, I even carried a copy in a small album in my purse. Every time I looked at that photo, I felt a sense of peace and calmness that always helped me get through the negatives I was dealing with at the time.

I thought of that happy place again today. I've been nursing a headache for 3 days amid the stress of non-working DSL lines, non-functioning car transmissions, worries about friends and families safety and not enough hours in the day to deal with it all. Sadly, this spot in Mexico seems to have lost some of it's magic for me, so I'll have to put some thought into my next happy spot. Or more likely, the perfect choice will become clear to me just like it did before -- right at the time I need it.

How "But" Can Help You Turn A Negative To A Positive

2011-08-28T22:28:00.000-07:00

I am a pessimist by nature. When bad things happen to me, my first reaction is always wondering how bad it will get next, who I have to fight to avoid being taken advantage of or how much the situation will cost me in terms of money, time or other resources.

I think that pessimism is part of what makes me so controlling at times. If I can just organize enough, prepare enough or manipulate a situation enough, I'll somehow see the trouble coming, or at least have the resources to battle it. Better yet, hopefully problems will avoid me altogether because they don't want to deal with a controlling, pessimistic witch.

It would be great if life worked that way, but it doesn't. Nothing you do can prepare you enough to completely prevent bad things from happening. Life is a zero sum game in that respect, the outcome of a balanced equation that ensures for every plus there is a minus, for every yin a yang, every up a down. The only thing you really get to control is how you manage your emotions through the ups and downs, and a big part of that control is finding perspective wherever and however you can.

My car broke down today. It was the most recent headache in a week fraught with them. Because I'm hard-wired for pessimism, my mind immediately started with the "why me, what did I do to deserve this" thoughts. I began focusing on the massive monkey wrench in the plans for my day, worrying about what the problem could be and what it would possibly cost me and how many other things would be turned into a mess in the coming week because of massive dip in the roller coasted track I didn't see coming. I even had the irrational thought that somehow this is my fault, some grand karmic payback from the universe that would strike me with the only freakish problem NOT covered under warranty that could possibly happen to a two year old car with only 30, 000 miles. I almost had a Sally Field-style breakdown.

Then voices of reason gradually crept back into my head. I was reminded that many of the people I love most faced a hurricane in the past 24 hours and made it through with no serious damage or injury. Other friends were still without power from the storm while I sat in comfortably in my air conditioned 73 degree apartment. I wasn't sitting in a hospital day after day watching my daughter fight for her life like another friend. I'm not fighting a terrible disease and I'm not dying -- and I know people doing both right now. In the grand scheme of things, my problems are so small I should be embarrassed at being so upset about a little thing like a car.

As I listened to all the negative voices in my head, I put a "but" at the end of every statement and continued my mental sentence with a counterpoint argument. It's a little trick I learned some time ago that when you use the word "but" as a transition between two thoughts, the "but" negates the first statement so the only thing you hear is the second part. Here's how it works:

"I can't get to work without my car, but I can work at home from my laptop like I did on Friday."

"I'm completely out of food, but I'm in walking distance to plenty of places to eat so I won't starve."

"I don't have much flexibility to go out right now, but I really have everything I need here at home."

I may still be a pessimist, BUT I still have some good things going for me.

How NOT To Provide Customer Service

2011-08-27T09:12:00.000-07:00

Customer service is a critical piece of every successful business, so it's always surprising to me when otherwise successful businesses treat their customers poorly. When I came home earlier this week to a suddenly non-functioning DSL line, I was reminded once again what an art good customer service really is -- because even a company with resources like AT&T can't manage to do it well.

Sadly, the communications giant and I have a history. I could have written a book on all the customer service mistakes they made trying to get my DSL service connected. To be fair, they don't always screw up. But when they do, they make the mistakes huge.

My first step was pulling out the instructions for my DSL modem and rebooting it. After three times without success, I called AT&T tech support and spent almost 20 minutes on hold getting to a live person who could check my line remotely. When they couldn't find the problem, the call got a lot longer.

Needless to say I wasn't happy spending that much time to work on a problem with no resolution.

I work in a customer service driven industry and understand full well that problems happen in the course of doing business. I also know what it's like to be on the receiving end of dealing with an angry customer. If I've learned one thing from those experiences, its that just because a customer is angry doesn't have to mean irreparable damage to the relationship -- if you manage the complaint the right way. The true test of a business is how they treat their customers when things aren't working well. By that measure, AT&T fails miserably in my experience.

If I could give advice to AT&T -- or any company for that matter -- on how to avoid providing poor customer service, here are some places to start.

Avoid repetition whenever possible.
Information like a name, address, account number and so on are obviously important to ask at the start of the process, but nothing is more maddening or impersonal to a customer than asking for the same information over and over. The same goes for having people explain their problem again to every new person who becomes part of the complaint process. It makes them feel like nothing is moving forward AND you don't care enough about their problem to listen and comprehend the problem. If you have to transfer a customer to another department or involve someone else, do a warm transfer and provide the next representative with the account number or any other information your company needs to do your job.

Repeating unnecessary steps to troubleshooting the issue is even worse, especially when it didn't work the first time. Remember, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over but expecting a different outcome. Don't provide insane customer service.

Give your customer options to communicate.
Many customers still prefer traditional phone calls, but I find them the least efficient way to get things done. I'm on the go and often in environments where taking a call isn't feasible. Missed calls are frustrating, as is having to make multiple calls to address an issue.

Email is a great option for more and more customers, but I think many companies are hesitant to use it because it creates a paper trail, which means they have to be accountable. Companies that provide bad service (and know it) don't want to be accountable. The important thing here is to ask the customer what works for them.

Don't try to engage your customers via social media of you aren't prepared to do it well.
During my disastrous experience getting my DSL hooked up initially, I took to commenting on Twitter about my difficulties and promptly became acquainted with @ATTCarolyn. We took our "relationship" from Twitter to an actual phone call, which then put me in touch with a complaint management person who eventually got things done for me, but not without a whole lot of effort. This time around, Twitter got me no response, making me wonder if I'm on some kind of AT&T Twitter "blacklist."

A friend of mine suggested I try AT&T's Facebook page, so I posted on their wall and got a response from "Robert G." He provided me his email and requested I send some information about the problem, which I did -- including my case number and a recap of the hour long phone call process I started with. He then responded by asking me to email my account number, address, etc. I responded by asking if he had access to the case number which should include all those details. No surprise that he did not.

In the end, both of AT&T's social media engagement strategies failed because the people managing them don't have the power to solve the problem. They were just another middle man passing along information without any real result -- AND no positive impact on my customer experience. Customers in the internet age are far to savvy for this kind of behavior. Do social media well or don't do it at all.

If you set an expectation, you have to deliver.
I finally got a service appointment the morning after I initially called about the problem (why it took THAT long is a whole other story). After arranging to work from home for the day, I waited. And waited. When the appointment time came and went, I called and spent another 30 minutes on the phone only to get excuses in response. "We're running behind. We're very sorry. We might get to you later today, but more likely it will be tomorrow." I was obviously not happy my Saturday was getting ruined, but I was even more upset AT&T didn't care enough to be more proactive when they knew there would be a problem. Reaching out to a customer to reset expectations when things go wrong is always better than forcing them to follow up and reacting later.

Apologizing isn't enough. You have to mean it.
When AT&T missed my appointment, I received an automated call later than evening apologizing for the delay and confirming the rescheduled appointment for the next day. By automated, I mean pre-programmed robot voice. As a customer, I can accept that mistakes get made and expectations have to be reset, but the fact that a company doesn't care enough about our relationship to have a live person call tells me a lot about the value they place on relationships. This isn't one that will be continuing much longer.

The one positive about my currently horrible customer service experience? Plenty of material for the next customer service class I teach! Maybe I should invite some AT&T employees to sit it.

Not Every Recipe Is A Winner

2011-08-12T23:47:00.000-07:00

I made plans with a girlfriend of mine for dinner this week, and rather than go out like we normally would, we decided to cook at my place. We hadn't had the opportunity to shoot the breeze in a while and we wanted to be comfortable and just hang.

I've been trying to build up my main dish recipe repertoire, so I cracked open a new cookbook I hadn't really looked at since I got it and found what looked like a light and appealing main dish. In some cases I get nervous cooking for someone else when I'm not sure how the dish will turn out, but my guest was a friend who's seen me through much worse stuff than a failed dinner, so I wasn't worried. Plus she brought a great bottle of wine so I knew there was no way the evening would be a total loss.

The protein choice of the evening was chicken breasts stuffed with spinach and ricotta. Here's the recipe as written.

8 single boneless chicken breasts, skin on
1 tablespoon butter
1 small onion, finely chopped
1 package fresh spinach, chopped
2 cups ricotta cheese
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon dried basil
pinch of pepper

1. Heat butter over medium heat in a large skillet. Add onion and cook until soft (about 4 minutes). Add spinach and cook for about 2 minutes, just until spinach has wilted and moisture evaporates.

2. Combine spinach mixture with ricotta cheese, salt, pepper and basil in a food processor and pulse four or five times to blend.

3. Trim excess fat from chicken breast. Loosen the skin from one side of the breast and stuff 1/4 cup of the ricotta cheese mixture under the skin. Tuck the loose skin under the breast, forming a round dome shape. Repeat with remaining breasts. Put the stuffed breasts close together in a buttered baking dish. Brush with melted butter.

4. Bake breasts in 350 degree oven until golden brown (about 35 minutes). Chicken breasts can be served whole or cooled to room temperature and sliced into 4 pieces each for a pretty presentation.

The result was a resounding.....meh. It was just bland. Ricotta is very light, but it also doesn't have a ton of flavor, and there wasn't quite enough onion, basil, salt and pepper in the stuffing mixture to really give it any oomph. I was also hoping for better crispiness in the chicken skin, but it ended up not having much of a purpose in the dish other than holding the filling in place. It probably would have been just as effective without the skin by just cutting into the chicken breasts and stuffing them the old fashioned way.

I did the panzanella recipe Leah discovered as the side dish so at least that was a hit. Making it was slightly bigger adventure than I expected when I discovered my vegetable peeler was missing. My knife skills are mediocre at best, so let's just say it's good the salad tasted awesome because I quite frankly butchered one poor cucumber trying to peel it the old fashioned way.

But the chicken dish still bothered me. So much potential, but definitely in need of tweaking. What did it need? Garlic? A more robust cheese? Stronger onion? Bacon? Bacon DOES make everything better....hmmmm.....

How would YOU make this bland chicken recipe sing?

The Downside of Birthdays in the Facebook Era

2011-08-01T22:03:00.000-07:00

Celebrating your birthday has positives and negatives in the age of Facebook.

On the plus side, you get hundreds of messages from people who, under normal circumstances, would never even know you were having a birthday, much less do anything to recognize it. But the downside is significant if you're old fashioned like me and still appreciate birthday cards.

It's a bit of work to send someone card, which is part of what makes it special to receive. The sender had to plan in advance, choose the right card with the right words and even think of a personal message to write in their own hand. They need to be close enough to you to care about having your mailing address and organized enough to find it. Then they need to find stamps. That's a lot to ask, even for a day as special as a birthday.

Sending a quick electronic message is easier. We're all busy, and using tools to gain efficiency can still allow us to be thoughtful towards our friends. And while an email, social network message or e-card is thoughtful, it just isn't the same.

A card is an ongoing message of joy for the recipient. Because if that person is like me and saves things like cards, it's a gift that will keep giving one day in the future when closets are cleaned out or drawers are reorganized. It gives when that card is opened again for the first time in years, and the memories and emotions you feel reading it are as fresh as yesterday.

Unlike Facebook messages, birthday cards have a timeless quality. And in certain areas of life, quality still trumps quantity any day.

Shattered

2011-07-28T23:44:00.000-07:00

Yesterday started off like any other day -- until the crash.

I was getting out of the car at work, trying to get something out of the trunk while juggling too much stuff in my hands. When my iPhone slipped out of one hand and fell to the cement parking deck, I knew by the sound I was in trouble.

Up until now, I was convinced this phone had nine lives. I've dropped it numerous times before, even lost it between the bleachers and the boards at Toyota Sports Center. To this day Kings radio color commentator Daryl Evans walks by me and shakes his head in wonder that I'm allowed to play with expensive toys unchaperoned.

But all those other times, the phone landed on a corner or skipped around a few times before it finally fell to Earth with a softened blow. This fall was straight down to a hard surface, landing flat as a pancake right on the screen face.

I knew from the soft crunching sounds the news was bad. It was confirmed as soon as I turned the phone over. And in short order, my day was shot to hell.

I've had my current phone for several years, which makes it a dinosaur in electronic terms. But I was holding off on getting a new one because Apple has a new iPhone design rumored to be coming out in the fall. The phone still worked and I tentatively ran my fingers over the shattered touch screen to see if it was still usable (as embarrassing at it would be to be seen with a battered phone). But the glass was too jagged in places and tiny shards poked at my skin. Continuing to use it just wasn't an option.

After I got over the shock of realizing I had to replace the phone, I hopped on the Internet to survey my options. I learned that Apple stores have a machine that can pull out the screen and replace it with another one in minutes, which would cost around $200 -- just about the cost of a new phone. Other articles indicated you could send it to a third party for repairs but it would take several days -- also not an option. So I had to suck it up, say goodbye to my trusted Kings-customizes iPhone 3G and purchase a new phone.

Now that I've had a day to play with it, I love the new phone. It's faster, the camera is far superior and it even records video. Part of me wonders why I waited so long to upgrade it.

The new kid on the block, complete with purple protective case

Then I realized why. Memories. The old phone is full of them. Kings hockey. The Tequila Sisters. Alumni Band. New York City. Hundreds of Foursquare check-ins during my travels coast-to-coast. Texting in Canada. Random photos of ordinary things I loved enough to document. Long problem solving calls with my best friends. Connections to people I love.

So rather than throw it away, I cleaned the screen on the old warrior one more time, turned it off and put it away in a safe place. It may be retired from active duty, but it will never be forgotten.

The Best Indoor BBQ - Ever!

2011-07-27T20:29:00.000-07:00

After my most recent trip to Seattle, I was sorting through old photos and was reminded of another great weekend cooking with my friend Leah a year ago. Then I looked at my Blogger account and realized I started a blog but never finished it. So this is a year late, but good food is always worth sharing to I figured I would finish the blog now. First, let me set the stage a bit....

Barbecues in the Pacific Northwest are always a day-to-day decision, because you just never know when it's going to rain. And in spite of nice weather when I first arrived, on the day Leah had planned to cook it was definitely raining, and stayed raining most of the day.

At least Leah and I know how to improvise. So we just set the table inside and figured good food makes a good barbecue, not the location. We even used the checked tablecloth to make it feel a little bit like eating outdoors.

Then it was time to hit the kitchen and execute Leah's grand meal plan. All recipes are from the Cooks Illustrated recipe archive, so if you're already a member you can grab them online. If you're not, I've printed the recipes here for your convenience.

Menu

Gas-Grilled Tuna Burgers with Wasabi Mayonnaise

French Potato Salad with Mustard and Fines Herbes

Buttermilk Coleslaw with Green Onions and Cilantro

Perfect Chocolate Chip Cookies

Gas-Grilled Tuna Burgers with Wasabi Mayonnaise
1 1/4 pounds tuna steaks (high-quality)
1 medium clove garlic , minced or pressed through a garlic press (about 1 teaspoon)
1 teaspoon minced fresh ginger
1/2 teaspoon table salt
Ground black pepper
Vegetable oil

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Chop tuna into 1/4- to 1/3-inch pieces. Using rocking motion with knife, continue to chop tuna until it is coarsely ground into pieces roughly 1/8 inch each. Mix with garlic, ginger, salt, and pepper to taste. Divide mixture into 4 equal portions (about 5 ounces each) and use your hands to press into compact patty about 1 inch thick. Place patties on parchment-lined baking sheet and refrigerate for at least 15 minutes.

2. Turn on all burners to high, close lid, and heat grill until very hot, about 15 minutes. Leave all burners on high.

3. Lightly dip small wad of paper towels in vegetable oil; holding wad with long-handled tongs, wipe cooking grate (see illustration below). Grill burgers, covered, until browned on one side, about 3 minutes. Flip burgers with greased metal spatula. Continue grilling, covered, to desired doneness, about 3 minutes for medium-rare or 4 minutes for medium. Serve immediately.

French Potato Salad with Mustard and Fines Herbes
2 pounds small red potatoes (about 2-inch diameter), unpeeled, scrubbed, and cut into 1/4-inch-thick slices
2 tablespoons table salt
1 medium clove garlic , peeled and threaded on skewer
1 1/2 tablespoons champagne vinegar or white wine vinegar
2 teaspoons Dijon mustard
1/4 cup olive oil
1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper
1 small shallot , minced (about 2 tablespoons)
1 tablespoon minced fresh chervil leaves
1 tablespoon minced fresh parsley leaves
1 tablespoon minced fresh chives
1 teaspoon minced fresh tarragon leaves

Note: If fresh chervil isn’t available, substitute an additional 1/2 tablespoon of minced parsley and an additional 1/2 teaspoon of tarragon. For best flavor, serve the salad warm, but to make ahead, follow the recipe through step 2, cover with plastic wrap, and refrigerate. Before serving, bring the salad to room temperature, then add the shallots and herbs.

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Place potatoes, 6 cups cold tap water, and salt in large saucepan; bring to boil over high heat, then reduce heat to medium. Lower skewered garlic into simmering water and partially blanch, about 45 seconds. Immediately run garlic under cold tap water to stop cooking; remove garlic from skewer and set aside. Continue to simmer potatoes, uncovered, until tender but still firm (thin-bladed paring knife can be slipped into and out of center of potato slice with no resistance), about 5 minutes. Drain potatoes, reserving 1/4 cup cooking water. Arrange hot potatoes close together in single layer on rimmed baking sheet.

2. Press garlic through garlic press or mince by hand. Whisk garlic, reserved potato cooking water, vinegar, mustard, oil, and pepper in small bowl until combined. Drizzle dressing evenly over warm potatoes; let stand 10 minutes.

3. Toss shallot and herbs in small bowl. Transfer potatoes to large serving bowl; add shallot/herb mixture and mix gently with rubber spatula to combine. Serve immediately.

Buttermilk Coleslaw with Green Onions and Cilantro
1 pound cabbage (about 1/2 medium head), red or green, shredded fine (6 cups)
Table salt
1 medium carrot , shredded on box grater
1/2 cup buttermilk
2 tablespoons mayonnaise
2 tablespoons sour cream
1 small shallot , minced (about 2 tablespoons)
1 tablespoon minced fresh cilantro leaves
1 teaspoon lime juice
1/2 teaspoon granulated sugar
2 scallions , sliced thin
1/8 teaspoon ground black pepper

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Toss shredded cabbage and 1 teaspoon salt in colander or large mesh strainer set over medium bowl. Let stand until cabbage wilts, at least 1 hour or up to 4 hours. Rinse cabbage under cold running water. Press, but do not squeeze, to drain; pat dry with paper towels. Place wilted cabbage and carrot in large bowl.

2. Stir buttermilk, mayonnaise, sour cream, shallot, cilantro, lime juice, sugar, scallions, 1/4 teaspoon salt, and pepper together in small bowl. Pour dressing over cabbage and toss to combine; refrigerate until chilled, about 30 minutes. (Coleslaw can be refrigerated for up to 3 days.)

Perfect Chocolate Chip Cookies
1 3/4cups unbleached all-purpose flour (8 3/4 ounces)
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
14 tablespoons unsalted butter (1 3/4 sticks)
1/2 cup granulated sugar (3 1/2 ounces)

1 teaspoon table salt
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 large egg
1 large egg yolk
1 1/4cups semisweet chocolate chips or chunks (see note)
3/4 cup chopped pecans or walnuts, toasted (optional)

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Adjust oven rack to middle position and heat oven to 375 degrees. Line 2 large (18- by 12-inch) baking sheets with parchment paper. Whisk flour and baking soda together in medium bowl; set aside.

2. Heat 10 tablespoons butter in 10-inch skillet over medium-high heat until melted, about 2 minutes. Continue cooking, swirling pan constantly until butter is dark golden brown and has nutty aroma, 1 to 3 minutes. Remove skillet from heat and, using heatproof spatula, transfer browned butter to large heatproof bowl. Stir remaining 4 tablespoons butter into hot butter until completely melted.

3. Add both sugars, salt, and vanilla to bowl with butter and whisk until fully incorporated. Add egg and yolk and whisk until mixture is smooth with no sugar lumps remaining, about 30 seconds. Let mixture stand 3 minutes, then whisk for 30 seconds. Repeat process of resting and whisking 2 more times until mixture is thick, smooth, and shiny. Using rubber spatula or wooden spoon, stir in flour mixture until just combined, about 1 minute. Stir in chocolate chips and nuts (if using), giving dough final stir to ensure no flour pockets remain.

I'm not gonna lie, I thought this step was borderline obsessive. We're mixing cookie dough, not making gunpowder! But Leah religiously kept the timer on me while I dutifully whisked the batter for EXACTLY 30 seconds, then timed it again as it rested. And while I wasn't completely bought into the process, I trust Leah and the Cooks Illustrated people. I think I added a pound of muscle to my arm doing the batter for these damn cookies! But it DID look pretty amazing....

4. Divide dough into 16 portions, each about 3 tablespoons (or use #24 cookie scoop). Arrange 2 inches apart on prepared baking sheets, 8 dough balls per sheet. (Smaller baking sheets can be used, but will require 3 batches.)

5. Bake cookies 1 tray at a time until cookies are golden brown and still puffy, and edges have begun to set but centers are still soft, 10 to 14 minutes, rotating baking sheet halfway through baking. Transfer baking sheet to wire rack; cool cookies completely before serving.

What can I say, we know how to put together a pretty nice spread of food -- and beverage!

All the food was delicious, but the star of the night was absolutely the cookies, thanks to a little spontaneous creativity. Leah had wanted to use the cookies to make ice cream sandwiches, but wasn't entirely sure how to make it the best presentation. I had seen an article in Martha Stewart Living a while ago about ice cream cakes, so I proposed softening the ice cream and using a cookie cutter to form it into perfect rounds.

Spreading out the ice cream before cutting....

The end result was absolute perfection.

Maybe it's time for us to open a catering business.....

Culinary Therapy

2011-07-25T21:08:00.001-07:00

Cooking is like many things in life. You start of with an idea of what you want to accomplish, then make a plan to get there. Sometimes the work goes smoothly, and other times you have to improvise or even create something completely new on the fly in order to realize your vision. Most of all, your outcome is better when it's the result of a collaboration with others who bring their own strengths and perspectives to the table to balance yours.

That's probably why I enjoy cooking with my dear friend Leah Jacobs so much. We're a lot alike, but also different enough that our skills complement each other. So every time I get to visit her in Seattle, we use our love of food and the strength of our friendship as an excuse to cook together. It's part food and part therapy, at least for me.

Leah and I have an unspoken deal about how things work in her kitchen. She's the brains of the operation (recipe finder, shopping list maker, and ingredient measurer extraordinaire) and I'm the brawn (chopper, mixer and dish washer). OK, that's not totally true -- Leah washes dishes too. But I digress.

The Brains of the operation hard at work...

I also get to steal all the great recipes she finds, which is worth the sweat equity I put in. Plus I get to eat fabulous meals with great company!

On my most recent trip to Seattle, we cooked up another winning combination for dinner, so I have FOUR recipes to share! This blog post is gonna be a long one because I don't have links to most of the recipes -- but I promise it will be YUMMY!

Fig, Prosciutto and Mascarpone Bruschetta With Grilled Baguette

Tequila Marinated Grilled Skirt Steak

Italian Bread Salad (aka Panzanella)

Berry Cheese Torte

Fig, Prosciutto and Mascarpone Bruschetta With Grilled Baguette

1 baguette sliced into 1/2" thick pieces
1 cup mascarpone cheese
1 tablespoon olive oil plus extra for baguette
3/4 cup chopped figs
4 ounces prosciutto sliced into thin pieces
1 shallot minced
2 cloves garlic minced
2 tablespoons honey
1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar
Salt and pepper

1) Heat grill or grill pan. Brush sliced baguette with olive oil and sprinkle with salt and pepper. Grill bread until marks appear (about 2 minutes). Leah and I actually toasted the bread in a 400 degree oven for about 10 minutes and it worked just as well.

2) In a saute pan, heat olive oil over medium high heat. Saute shallot for 2 minutes. Add prosciutto and cook until meat starts to crisp (about 4 minutes). Add figs and garlic and cook 2 more minutes, then add vinegar and honey and season with salt and pepper to taste.

3) Divide mascarpone cheese and spread over grilled baguette slices. Top with fig/prosciutto mix and serve.

So pretty, super tasty, and SO EASY! The hardest part is the chopping -- especially the figs because they're pretty sticky! And there was not one morsel left so it's a crowd pleaser.

Italian Bread Salad (Panzanella)

I knew this had to be good since it was a Cooks Illustrated recipe. It certainly didn't disappoint, although Leah and I made a few minor adjustments.

6 cups rustic Italian or French bread , cut or torn into 1-inch pieces (1/2 to 1 pound)
1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil
Salt and pepper
1 1/2 pounds tomatoes , cored, seeded, and cut into 1-inch pieces
3 tablespoons red wine vinegar
1 cucumber , peeled, halved lengthwise, seeded, and sliced thin
1 shallot, sliced thin
1/4 cup chopped fresh basil

1) Adjust oven rack to middle position and heat oven to 400 degrees. Toss bread pieces with 2 tablespoons oil and ¼ teaspoon salt; arrange bread in single layer on rimmed baking sheet. Toast bread pieces until just starting to turn light golden, 15 to 20 minutes, stirring halfway through. Set aside to cool to room temperature.

2) Gently toss tomatoes and ½ teaspoon salt in large bowl. Transfer to colander and set over bowl; set aside to drain for 15 minutes, tossing occasionally. So you'll notice in the ingredients is says to seed and core the tomatoes. We bought these lovely little plum tomatoes so we'd have an easier time cutting them into one inch pieces, but it took forever to seed and core them, and not much additional juice drained out of the tomatoes after the 15 minutes were up. If I had to do it over, I'd use regular tomatoes, not seed and core them so that the juice around the seeds could run out, and then run it through a sieve to remove the seeds.

3) Whisk remaining 6 tablespoons oil, vinegar, and ¼ teaspoon pepper into reserved tomato juices. Add bread pieces, toss to coat, and let stand for 10 minutes, tossing occasionally.

4) Add tomatoes, cucumber, shallot, and basil to bowl with bread pieces and toss to coat. Season with salt and pepper to taste, and serve immediately. We goofed here too and realized we didn't have an extra shallot, so we used a small amount of thinly sliced red onion and it worked just as well.

It's the perfect salad for summer. No dressing needed, very light and a colorful addition to any plate. It also disappeared.

Tequila Marinated Grilled Flank Steak

3/4 cup freshly squeezed lime juice (approximately 8 large limes)
1/2 cup clear tequila
1/4 cup soy sauce
1/4 cup minced garlic
1 bunch roughly chopped cilantro, leaves and stems included
1 Jalapeno pepper, seeded and diced
1 Serrano pepper, seeded and diced
1 teaspoon cumin powder
1 tablespoon freshly cracked black pepper
1 1/2-2 pounds flank steak

I knew this recipe was a guaranteed winner. Anytime you get to marinate meat in alcohol, it's a fun day in the kitchen. We also used skirt steak instead of flank steak and it worked just as well. Leah spent quite a bit of time chatting up the meat choice with the butcher so she knows the difference between the two. I personally have no clue. In my world, meat is meat and it's ALL good. Here's how you make it.

1) Combine all ingredients in s resealable plastic gallon bag. Confession time: Leah and I used bottled lime juice. Normally we're up to the task of fresh squeezing, but the limes we found at the store were TINY and it would have taken forever! We chose a shortcut so we could have time for a cocktail -- so sue us. Add the steak and let marinate in refrigerator for 2 hours. Remove and let marinate at room temperature another 30-45 minutes.

2) Prepare grill to medium-high heat. Remove steak from marinade, reserving marinade. Put marinade in a small sauce pot and bring to a boil, then strain and reserve.

3) Place steak on the grill. Cook for 4 minutes, turn 180 degrees and cook for 3 minutes more (to create cross grill marks). Flip over and finish cooking for 3-5 minutes, depending on doneness. Remove from grill and move to cutting board and let rest, lightly covered, for 5 minutes. Slice against grain and serve immediately with reserved marinade.

Now THAT is some tasty meat!

Berry Cheese Torte

This recipe was my contribution to the party. Leah was looking for something sweet that didn't have chocolate, and I had found this going through my recipe stash. It's published online, so I'm going to save myself some typing on this already long post and just link it for you, then follow it with some photos and notes.

http://www.tasteofhome.com/Recipes/Berry-Cheese-Torte

So this is basically a fruit tart with a revised take on the typical graham cracker crust using vanilla wafers and ginger snaps instead of graham crackers. Major yummy! But the crust was the first issue I had with the recipe.

It says to use a 9" springform pan, but the amount of crust mix was not enough to cover the pan AND go 1 1/2 inches up the side. If the crust portion of the recipe was doubled it would have worked. The other option would be to use a 8" pan.

As luck would have it, Leah's kitchen has this great little tool called a tamper so I was able to get the crust to work per the recipe, but with a lot more effort than expected. But after it baked, I was still a little worried because the crust wasn't sticking together along the sides of the pan.

We didn't have enough time to redo it, so we went with it, figuring the gelatin in the fruit portion of the recipe would help hold it together. Or the cream cheese filling part. All the pieces of this puzzle would come together somehow.

Speaking of gelatin, that brings me to the second issue with the recipe. You dissolve gelatin in grape juice, then heat it. It says that it should then set up in 45 minutes in the fridge, but it took at least twice that long. A couple of notes on the recipe site mentioned the same thing, so I know it wasn't just us. Next time, I'd probably try heating the grape juice before adding the gelatin so it would dissolve faster and hopefully activate better.

We really shouldn't have worried, because the finished product turned out just fine -- and was a tasty as we hoped!

HUGE thanks to Leah for yet another one-of-a-kind amateur test kitchen experience resulting in an amazing meal! Try any of these recipes and I promise you'll get raves.

Now go cook something, will ya?

Cheesesteak Wars: Who Makes The Best Steak in Philly?

2011-07-21T23:59:00.000-07:00

No visit to Philadelphia is complete without sampling the city's most beloved food -- the cheesesteak. If Seattle is known for having a coffee shop on every corner, then Philly has a cheesesteak joint on every one of theirs. But not all cheesesteaks are created equal, and anyone who has spent much time in Philly has an opinion on whose steak is best. Since I was in Philly for two days, I decided to try two.

The steak on the left is from my first stop - Jim's Steaks on South Street.

Jim's was recommended by a dear friend who is a Philly area native, and she swore it was absolutely the best steak in the city. Apparently a lot of other people feel that way too, because the place was PACKED and it was late in the afternoon before I got around to having lunch.

At Jim's, you get a birds eye view of the guy assembling your steak as you order, and it's a delight to behold. I ordered a steak with provolone, lettuce and tomato.

First, the cheese went on the bun, which then got pressed face down on the grill for about 5 seconds. Then a flick of the wrist was all it took to slap a healthy portion of meat between the bread and finish with the lettuce and tomato.

Let's see that again, but bigger!

The steak at Jim's had amazing flavor, plus the bun was nice and soft from those few seconds on the grill. It probably soaked up a nice little bit of grease as well, which made it all the more tasty.

The next day, I checked out Pat's King of Steaks.

Pat's is located in a hardscrabble working-class South Philly neighborhood right out of Rocky. In fact, one of the scenes in the movie was filmed at Pat's, so they have a little plaque to commemorate that.

Pat's was founded by the Oliveri Brothers, who according to Wikipedia are "generally credited as the 1933 co-creators of the Philly Cheesesteak." When you ask most casual visitors to Philly where to go for a steak, they'll normally mention Pat's or Geno's, which is right on the opposite corner of the street.

Since they get a lot of tourists, the Pat's gang are also kind enough to give you instructions on how to order a steak. Who knew there was a right way?

I ordered a "steak wit provolone." No good visual on the guy making your steak this time, just the dude leaning out a small window to take your money. And the other interesting thing about Pat's was the ordering process for anything else BUT a steak -- that all happened at another window, with a separate register. That one was a head scratcher, but I guess the guy taking the steak orders needs to stay focused.

The Pat's steak was good, but didn't come close to matching Jim's. The meat quality was about the same, but the bun just didn't have that same softness and flavor. And looking at both steaks side by side above, it's pretty clear Jim's gets you the bigger portion. All told, Jim's was the big winner for me.

Regardless of what steak you prefer, here are some final tips to get the most out of your Philly cheesesteak experience.

Bring plenty of cash. Neither of these joints take credit cards and a steak plus a drink will run you about $10. There is an ATM around the corner from Jim's, but not a cash machine in sight near Pat's.
Have patience, especially if you're going during a busy time. Both places can get really busy.
Seating can be a little tricky, so be prepared to eat on the fly if needed. Of course, you can always get it to go.

Sadly, my Philly cheesesteak experience was not complete because I never had a steak the "traditional" way -- with Cheese Wiz. Guess that means I gotta go back. Life is rough sometimes...

East Coast Adventures: Philadelphia

2011-07-21T23:52:00.000-07:00

After I was done reuniting with my classmates and spending time with family in Delaware, I headed up to Philadelphia for a couple of days.

Philly will always have a special place in my heart because it was the closest "big" city to where I grew up. When I was in grade school, we lived in Wilmington, DE during the United States Bicentennial, and in 1976 I took my first trip to see the place democracy started in our country. I distinctly remember the Liberty Bell, which at that time was outside just across the mall from Independence Hall.

The little Liberty Bell in the bottom left corner is a ceramic bank circa 1976! What a coincidence!

This is the first time I've revisited the historic sites in the city, and a lot has changed over the years in a good way. The Liberty Bell is now enclosed in a beautiful new visitors center and Independence Hall in undergoing some exterior renovation. As luck would have it, I picked a great day to do things inside, because it poured rain at one point. But wet or dry the historic part of Philadelphia is more beautiful than I remembered it.

The next day, I visited some popular tourist sites in the city for the very first time. That day the weather was hot and sunny, so Boathouse Row was the right place to start the day.

Set along the east bank of the Schuylkill River, Boathouse Row is home to all the local collegiate and social rowing clubs. If you follow the walking path further into Fairmount Park, you get gorgeous views of the river, and if you walk far enough you get the Philadelphia skyline in the background!

After Boathouse Row, I headed to the Philadelphia Museum of Art, which is probably most famous for the iconic steps Sylvester Stallone ran up in the first Rocky movie. They even have a Rocky statute just off to one side of the bottom of the steps and a bronze plaque at the top exactly where Rocky stood at the end of his run. More importantly, you get a great view straight down Market Street right to City Hall.

Philly is a fantastic sports city, so I couldn't leave without taking in a Phillies game at Citizens Bank Park. The Boston Red Sox were in town, so the game was sold out, the crowd was great and most importantly -- the Phillies won!

I crammed a lot into two days -- maybe that calls for a cheesesteak?

Partying Like It's 1986!

2011-07-18T22:57:00.000-07:00

The main reason for the timing of my trip home in June was my 25 year high school reunion. It was incredibly special for me because it was literally the first time in more than two decades that I had seen most of my classmates.

My class held two previous reunions at 5 and 10 years, and I missed both. At five, I was just out of college and still too intent on finding my own way to go back and visit a past I was trying to distance myself from. My 10 year happened the year I moved from Virginia Beach to Seattle, and things were just too chaotic to make time for a trip home. But this time, my life was stable, I knew about the event a year in advance thanks to our great planning committee and I was due for a trip home to Delaware. No excuses. And to tell the truth, I was actually looking forward to it.

The words "high school" and "reunion" in the same sentence can put fear in the heart of even the most confident person. If you dread reunions, it's because you see them as reminders of how much of your life is gone, of the dreams you had as a kid that went unrealized or of how much your physical appearance has changed in ways you don't like.

But reunions can also be a powerful reminder of how the people and experiences you had all those years ago shaped the person you are today for the better. Judy Adams, our class adviser, was one of those people.

She was part teacher and part mother to all of us. Her son Chris was a member of our class. Sadly, he's one of the friends we've lost over the years. I imagine seeing all of us was bittersweet for her in a way, but I'm so glad she came because our gathering would have seemed incomplete without her.

Living in a world with social tools like Facebook definitely helped take some of the anxiety out of getting reacquainted with people I hadn't seen in a long time. I was already connected with more than half of my classmates that attended, so I knew what they looked like now, what was going on in their lives and what their current interests were. There were still the occasional glances down at name tags before saying hello to people I didn't recognize, but the small talk got started a lot easier.

And the more I talked with people, the more I realized most of us hadn't really changed all that much. Our life experiences had just made us better versions of ourselves. And as the memories flooded back and friendships were re-established, it didn't matter how much time had passed, how much weight we'd gained or how we made a living.

All that mattered was that we were a class again. And if I do say so myself, 1986 was a really great year.

Wet, Wild and Dewey

2011-07-14T21:39:00.000-07:00

After the craziness of planning Will's 13th birthday party, my sister-in-law needed a night out and with me visiting she had an easy excuse. So my Mom agreed to keep an eye on the boys and Barb and I headed down to The Starboard in Dewey Beach.

We did have a reason for going other than relieving party planning stress. My brother was working that night as the sound board guy (he's the local rock star in our family) and some dude named Reggie Branch was having a party.

Rock Star Brother at work

I am an idiot about professional football, so I had no idea who Reggie was (he won the Superbowl with the Redskins? Well, it isn't The Stanley Cup, but that's cool...). Dave and Barb know him from The Starboard, which is his summer hangout. He sponsors a charity golf tournament every year and happy hour was at the bar.

My brother big pimpin' with Reggie and the boys

Reggie is one very cool, down-to-Earth dude, and all the retired NFL guys partying with him were a hoot! I couldn't tell you who they were, especially since they kept switching name tags with each other. I know there were former Eagles and Redskins, and Kristen and Joe (the band) got a little fight song sing-a-long competition going between the Redskins and Eagles fans.

Should we start a sing-a-long, Joe?

Let's sing AND do shots!

Dewey Beach in the summer is your classic college frat party scene, which is still a great time after all these years and a great place to escape the rigors of adult life for a while. Plenty of fantastic local bands, cheap drinks and flip flops abound, along with....um, creative decor.

But if you can't have fun in the summer, you're not really living are you? As Jimmy Buffet would say, "If we couldn't laugh we would all go insane."

I'll drink to that. Thanks for a great party Dewey!

Thirteen

2011-07-13T21:23:00.000-07:00

My oldest nephew turned 13 the beginning of June, and due to school, baseball schedules, etc. his birthday party ended up happening while I was back home. That meant Aunt Meg got to help out with the party -- 15 twelve to thirteen year kids, a pool, and hot tub. Needless to say, I wasn't sure I could handle it! I also found out why all moms need a weekend away with the girls and a bunch of cocktails every so often.

This is what 13 look like!

Actually, the kids were really good overall. Our biggest battle was reminding them not to do any flips off the diving board. And watching them was actually an interesting sociology lesson.

Teenagers are interesting creatures. They're full of hormones that make them do crazy things at times, like talk back to their parents in ways they've never done before. If you're a mom used to hugs and kisses from a pre-teen boy, expect them to stop as soon as he becomes a full-fledged teenager (totally not cool to like your mom that much).

Although it IS cool to be taller than your Mom...

And while kids at this age start getting interested in the opposite sex, they still have no idea how to interact with each other.

At the beginning, it was almost like two separate parties were happening -- one for the girls and one for the boys. If the girls were in the pool, the boys were in the got tub. Once one of the girls got brave and headed over to see what the boys were doing, one by one they headed to the pool and the girls took over the hot tub. It was at least an hour before they all ended up in the pool at the same time!

The other thing I learned is that teenage boys and girls DO NOT EAT TOGETHER. They were at separate tables the entire time -- at least until the s'mores came out and they all had to gather around the fire pit.

Will was a trooper in spite of having a broken wrist that made swimming impossible. His Dad managed to find a solution to at least let him get in the hot tub, although it wasn't all that comfortable for the poor kid. As if being 13 isn't hard enough!

But Will is a good sport about most things, so he hung in there. His friends were also VERY generous with their birthday gifts, and he ended up with quite a wad of cash and gift certificates!

In the end, everyone had a great time, plus no one got hurt or grounded (at least that I could tell) and Aunt Meg survived. And when you're a teenager, that's a successful party!

Weekend in Napa

2011-07-11T19:52:00.000-07:00

Flight from LAX to SFO: $199
Last minute bargain room at resort hotel in wine country: $109
Ferry from San Francisco to Napa: $27

Concert in the middle of a vineyard: $75

Wine, champagne, mysterious bottled vodka drink and poolside mojitos: $150

One-of-kind birthday celebration for your best friend: Priceless

Seaside Treasures

2011-07-08T08:39:00.000-07:00

When I was a little girl spending summers at the beach, I loved wandering the coastline searching for seashells. I had boxes and jars full of them my collected treasures. And every so often I'd be lucky enough to find a piece of beach glass peeking out of the sand.

Beach glass comes from pieces of broken bottles that become worn down by the waves. Most of the time it's green, light blue or clear. Occasionally I remember finding a bright blue one, which was always exciting. When I was in high school, I even recall walking on the beach with one of my boyfriends, who found a lovely piece of beach glass and gave it to me. I think I still have it somewhere...

So when I was driving around at home and saw a roadside banner advertising the Lewes Historical Society Sea Glass Festival, I knew I had to pop over and check it out. Who knew there was so much beach glass in the world?

They even had a shard identification room run by the Sussex Bottle Club, so if you had a piece of your own glass or an old bottle you found on the beach they could help figure out how old it was, where it came from, etc.

Most of the artisans there had beach glass jewelry, but there were some other interesting things as well. I especially liked the framed photos with designs made out of beach glass. That might have to be a future craft project to try some day!

Visiting the festival also gave me a chance to walk around downtown Lewes, DE. Lewes was the first European settlement in the state of Delaware, and therefore the first city in the first state to ratify the US Constitution (that's your little Delaware history lesson for the day). It's a beautiful little town with gorgeous Victorian style homes, so I had a little fun walking around and looking for my future beach house by the sea. I dream big!

And no stop in Lewes is complete without a visit to King's Ice Cream! On a day with temperatures close to 90 degrees, a little homemade mint chocolate chip really hit the spot!

I had to eat fast - it was melting on me!

Lewes is one of my favorite summer spots to visit. What's your favorite summer place?

Maiden Voyage

2011-07-07T19:36:00.000-07:00

Experience has taught me that one of the keys to traveling successfully is your comfort level with your luggage. So I was just a little nervous starting my trip back East since it was also my first time out with my new travel buddy -- the purple carry-on bag.

As you may recall, the old carry-on bag I use for my computer and other essentials had a bit of a rough trip to Tennessee. The damaged wheel got repaired, but that poor bag has endured 7 years of hard labor following me around the world and it's starting to look a little worse for wear. Plus I've never been totally happy with it as a true overnight bag since it's just one big compartment with no way to keep clothes separate from the computer and other stuff. Hence the purchase of a new carry-on.

A new bag requires a new routine, just like swapping out your old purse for a new one. You have to decide on the best pocket for everything to go in, you pull things out for security checks in a different order, you double check to make sure you pull the right back out of the airplane overhead compartment, etc. It takes a little getting used to even if the new bag is better than the old one.

After 5,000 miles of flying through 3 different airports, I'm absolutely in love with this bag! My travels went off without a hitch, it has a ton more room and it was even easier to access my computer than with the old bag.

Front compartment for your laptop -- complete with a sleeve/sling to keep it safe!

Roomy enough in the back for a couple days worth of clothes!

It's even slightly more narrow than the old bag so it glides down airplane aisles without catching on seats!

If you're in the market for a new carry-on yourself, here's a link so you can get one of your own. The style is called "Big Sur." Very California!

http://ricardobeverlyhills.com/

Happy travels!

The Peace Lily

2011-07-07T07:36:00.000-07:00

In addition to cooking, Mom had another job for me during my visit home, but this one was truly a labor of love. Back in December during my last visit, she had asked me to re-pot one of her house plants. I suggested waiting until the summer since winter is a more dormant time for most plants and I didn't want to shock it too badly and damage it. After all, this plant is special.

It's a peace lily and it's been with my Mom for over 10 years. For her, that's quite an accomplishment. When I was growing up, green things were pretty much my Dad's domain, and with 18.5 acres of farm land around our house, he had something growing pretty much all the time. He used to joke that Mom had a black thumb and she'd probably kill a plant if she had one. Aside from the random african violet on the kitchen window sill, plants weren't really part of the decor inside the house.

I'm convinced my Dad has had a hand in her success with this particular plant, because he is the reason it came into her life.

When he passed away shortly before Christmas in 2000, a group of my closest friends from college sent this peace lily to my mother in honor of his passing. I still remember going home for the funeral and reading the card from the florist with her, watching her shock and surprise that people she had met only briefly would make such a kind gesture. Long after other flowers she received passed their peak and were discarded, the peace lily thrived.

I had re-potted it once before, but it must have been over five years ago. The plant was still healthy, but it had stopped blooming and we were pretty convinced it was from being constricted in a pot it had outgrown. It just needed a new pot and a little love to get it going again. So we found a tape measure, got the dimensions of the old pot and set out to Lowe's to pick out a suitable replacement.

Once we had secured a larger pot and some fresh potting soil, I took the peace lily outside to get it ready for its new home. The roots were clustered tightly together at the bottom of the old pot, so I spread them apart and cleared away some of the older yellowed leaves withering under the canopy of healthy ones. Then it was time to move the plant into it's new space and give it a nice long drink of water.

Thankfully the larger pot still fits in the sunny corner of the living room where Mom can keep an eye on it. She can easily see it from her favorite TV watching spot, which coincidentally is positioned at just about the same distance and angle from which she used to watch my Dad fall asleep in his favorite recliner at our old house.

This peace lily is a beautiful, evergreen reminder that real love never dies. It just adapts to find ways to stay in your heart forever.

I'm excited to check on it when I'm home around Christmas to make sure it's blooming again. Something tells me Daddy and his green thumb will find a way to make that happen.

Can I Borrow Cup of Sugar?

2011-07-06T17:55:00.000-07:00

Before I even made the trek home to Delaware, my mother was making me a to-do list for my visit. I got this e-mail from her two days before I left....

***************************************************************

FYI----------- 1. DE is now a no hand held phones while driving state. They don't need any other reason to pull you over, and tickets run over $100, so BE CAREFUL !!!!!

2. We're invited to a cookout at Winnie and Mary's on Sunday evening. I'm doing deviled eggs, of course, and you're making the pretzel salad. Hope that's OK with you.

See you soon!!

***************************************************************

I love my Mom. It's her recipe, but somehow being the family Pretzel Salad chef has become my trademark. Lucky for her I enjoy doing it.

I had the same job last summer when I was home, although we ran into some snags last time. First off, the cookbook she had the recipe in was missing a step. It didn't say to put any sugar in with the crushed pretzels and butter, so when I baked the crust, it didn't harden. Luckily I noticed it in time to make a second attempt. But then we realized the bigger problem -- there was no sugar in the house.

While this may seem strange to a lot of people, it actually makes a lot of sense since my Mom is diabetic and doesn't bake that much. I was grabbing my keys to head out to the store when she said, "Just go next door and ask Sue (her neighbor) if you can borrow some sugar."

I don't know about you, but the last time I saw anyone pop next door to borrow a cup of a sugar, I'm pretty sure I was watching a "Leave It To Beaver" or "I Love Lucy" show. Who borrows food from their neighbor any more? But then I reminded myself it's one of the great things about small town life -- people still actually know each other well enough to do things like that.

Sue is a lovely woman, but sadly also equipped with a pantry devoid of sugar. So it was my sister-in-law to the rescue, and the baking continued.

Fast forward to this visit, and the first thing I asked Mom when I arrived was whether she had sugar. This time, she did, which was actually kind of sad, because I didn't have an excuse to bug Sue. Luckily she dropped by and I got to say hello, even if I was without a measuring cup in hand.

Country Roads, Take Me Home

2011-07-06T08:12:00.000-07:00

The first stop on my recent vacation took me home to Delaware. For the past several years, I've traveled through Baltimore due to flight availability on the airlines I regularly use. Now that Southwest has expanded its gates in a number of airports, I decided to give Philadelphia a try instead. It's a slightly shorter trip to my Mom's place from there and a more direct drive.

It's also a trip back in time.

When I was a little girl growing up in Wilmington, DE my parents had a cottage in Dewey Beach where we spent most of the summer. The two hour car trip heading down Route 13 and connecting with Route 1 was a treasured scavenger hunt, each mile of the journey marked by sightings of my favorite landmarks. As a kid, I knew exactly how close we were getting to the beach not by the mile markers by the side of the road, but by those familiar guideposts.

The St. Georges Bridge...
The enormous horse farm with the whitewashed fence outside of Odessa....
The roadside stand just after Smyrna where we would stop to buy sweet corn and watermelon....
The marshy smell that started just after we passed Dover Air Force Base....
The old boat painted to advertise the entrance to Taylor Marine around the corner from Slaughter Beach....
The pink Sea-Esta Motel that marked our arrival in Dewey Beach....

Those were the days before Route 1 was extended to bypass cities like Odessa and Smyrna, so the drive now is a little different, but I can still see those landmarks from the new road. And the land by the sides of the road is still pretty wide open despite plenty of new housing developments that have been built over the years. Still lots of room for the corn and soybean fields...

But the part of the drive I didn't appreciate as a kid was the sky. The unique colors seen only on Delmarva as the sun sets and dusk approaches. I never appreciated them as a kid because I hadn't been anywhere else to know that the sky is different everywhere you go, that no two sunsets looks the same when you view them from different places on this Earth.

One of the real treasures of leaving home is coming back and rediscovering the beauty right under your nose. As a teenager, I remember this small town world feeling restricting, like a place I needed to escape. As an adult, I know there is no place more free, open and accepting than the place you can always call home.

The Plan

2011-07-05T17:59:00.000-07:00

I've never been much of a planner. While I'm really organized and I have general long term goals, I don't spend enough time thinking through all the strategic and tactical steps to make them happen. I tend to take life as it comes and simply focus on making the best of the situations I face.

When I have been able to create a strategy to accomplish something, I know I can follow through. I did it when I lost 35 pounds last year. The problem becomes turning those short term goals into long term success, as evidenced by the fact that I've gained back 10 of the pounds I lost.

Back in December, I had this great idea to spend my last days of the year actually creating a long term plan for my life that I could start executing on January 1st. I even started writing a blog about it. I never finished the plan or the blog, but the need for a life plan has been nagging at me ever since.

The year is half over now, but I still have half a year go, so I figure there is no time like the present to get my butt back on track. Over the past few weeks, I've been making lists of short and long term priorities, along with time lines and goals to measure them. And since one of the things I learned through my previous weight loss was that writing about my progress helped hold me accountable, I'll be blogging about the details along the way.

A huge part of executing my plan is adopting a new attitude about one of the biggest things that derails me. When I start thinking about what I want to accomplish, I always find myself saying, "I'll work on that as soon as I get myself caught up on everything else." But the more I've thought about it, the more I've realized that life just doesn't work out that neatly. There will always be items on the to-do list, things that get in the way, etc. So along with my plan, I also have a new personal motto...

"There is no such thing as caught up."

Once you accept you'll never really be "done," there is really nothing left to get in the way of what you want.

Life has also taught me that when things go haywire you need a sense of humor to cope. There is a distinct possibility my plan and I could fall flat on our faces. I'm stubborn, so I'm not going to let that possibility of failure stop me. But just in case I need a little reality check from time to time, I have another plan to fall back on. I rediscovered this one in my "Happy File" and it's always made me feel better.

The Plan

In the beginning was The Plan

And then came the assumptions

And the assumptions were without form

And The Plan was without substance

And darkness was upon the face of the worker

And they spoke among themselves saying

"It is a crock of shit, and it stinketh"

And the workers went unto the supervisor and said

"It is a pail of dung and none may abide by the odor thereof"

And the supervisors went unto the managers saying

"It is a container of excrement and it is very strong such that none may abide by it"

And the managers went unto their directors saying

"It is a vessel of fertilizer and none may abide by its strength"

And the directors spoke among themselves saying to one another

"It contains that which aids plant growth and it is very strong"

And the directors went unto the vice-presidents saying unto them

"It promotes grows and is very powerful"

And the vice-presidents went unto the president saying unto him

"This new plan will actively promote the growth and vigor of the company with powerful effects"

And the president looked upon The Plan and saw that it was good

And The Plan became policy

This is how shit happens

With that thought, I'm off to the gym. Part 1 of my plan involves regular dates with the elliptical machine...

What A Long Strange Trip It's Been...

2011-07-04T18:14:00.000-07:00

You've probably been wondering what happened to me. If you haven't, I'm not offended since I haven't always been the most consistent blogger. But if you noticed, I'd been better about keeping things up to date until I dropped off the radar again a couple of weeks ago.

You probably won't be shocked to hear that I went on another vacation. This time, I headed back East to some of my old stomping grounds, and some newer ones that feel more like home to me the more I visit them. I once again made a concerted effort to fully enjoy my time off and immerse myself in the experience instead of struggling to keep up with talking about it here while it was going on.

As much as I enjoyed the daily photo posting during my adventures in April, this time the stories I wanted to share deserved more than just photos. But I thought I'd post a few from the collection here to get you guessing about where my stories will go this time around.

After 5,000 miles flown, 876 miles driven through 4 states and numerous city blocks wandered, I've got a lot to share. I hope you enjoy every story as much as I enjoyed living them.

Which Came First - The Chicken or The Waffles?

2011-06-21T23:09:00.000-07:00

My sister and her husband have been making at least one trip West every year of late, and we've developed a little tradition for their annual stop-overs in Los Angeles -- we make a food pilgrimage to Hollywood's holy food temple of down-home tastiness and utter unhealthiness.

Roscoe's is the stuff of Los Angeles legend. Founded in 1976 as an all-night take-out restaurant (the first of its kind in LA) it has evolved into a five location chain that feeds everyone from actors to rappers to ordinary folks like you and me.

Chicken and waffles are the staples, but a whole host of home-cooked sides like baked macaroni and cheese, candied yams and greens will tempt you too. There are salads and other healthier options if you're not inclined to stuff your face, but I had saved my appetite all day so I could go whole hog on the Scoe's #1 -- a quarter fried chicken with two enormous waffles slathered in butter and syrup.

Of course, I'm also a mac & cheese addict, so I had a side of that as well.

I stopped short of licking the last bits of syrup and butter off the plate, but there was not a morsel of food left otherwise. By the time I got home I was so full it felt uncomfortable to sit down. I promptly fell into a food coma the second I hit the bed. I still felt full when I woke up this morning.

I guess it's a good thing my sister won't be back for a while. I need time to digest. LOTS of time.

Chalk Talk

2011-06-20T17:15:00.000-07:00

I was running errands during lunch time today and wandered over to the outdoor mall next my office and into the middle of a beautiful surprise. A sidewalk art exhibition had been held there over the Fathers Day weekend and the sidewalk paintings were still intact!

Every time I see chalk art like this, I think of the scene in Mary Poppins where Mary and her charges frolic for an afternoon inside the fairytale landscapes drawn on the sidewalk by Bert the Pavement Artist.

What a beautiful way to spend part of a Monday afternoon!

Kitchen Adventures: S'mores Indoors

2011-06-20T00:57:00.000-07:00

One of the pure joys of summer is melting marshmallows on a stick over a camp fire or grill, then smashing them together with some chocolate and graham crackers to make s'mores. But you don't have to wait for summer, or even need a camp fire or grill, to enjoy this creative take on s'mores from none other than Martha Stewart.

I uncovered this little gem of a recipe during my filing box clean-out this weekend. I figured a two days of hard work and reorganization deserved a little reward, so I there was no time like the present to try this dessert out. And with July 4th weekend around the corner, you can probably use some fresh food ideas for your holiday festivities, right?

Here's all you need to make S'more Quesadillas.

1 small bag mini-marshmallows
Chocolate
Tortillas

Now Martha says to use burrito sized tortillas, but I thought the medium soft taco size looked better. She also recommends a four ounce bar of semi-sweet chocolate. I decided to try two chocolate options and get the traditional Hershey's Milk Chocolate in addition to some Ghiradelli 60% cocoa morsels. I wanted to see if there was a difference in which would melt better, plus Hershey's is the traditional go-to chocolate for s'mores at every cookout I've attended.

The rest is easy as pie. Heat a grill pan on medium high heat. Put down the first tortilla, spread out your marshmallows and chocolate, then top it immediately with a second tortilla.

Here is the version with the semi-sweet morsels.

Here is the one with the Hershey's bar broken into pieces.

Grill them for a minute on each side, then cut into quarters and enjoy the ooey-gooey goodness!

There was no discernible difference between the melting ability of the different chocolates, so it's really your choice of what you think tastes better. I preferred the semi-sweet morsels. But the best part about this recipe is you could easily do the same thing outdoors on a grill. If your heat source is a camp fire, you're probably better off sticking with the marshmallow on a stick approach.

So now whether you're stuck inside or enjoying the outdoors, s'mores can be yours anytime your heart desires! Enjoy!

Love, Loss And Fathers Day

2011-06-19T10:31:00.000-07:00

A friend of mine at work lost her father recently. When I found out, the first thing I did was send her an e-mail offering my ear if she needed to talk. After all, no one else understands losing a parent quite like someone who has been through it before.

My Dad hasn't been with us for almost 11 years now, yet I can still remember the day he died as vividly as it was yesterday. Where I was standing in my Burbank, CA apartment when the phone rang. The sound of my sister-in-law's voice when she spoke my name that told me instantly that he was gone without her even saying the words. The call to the airline looking for a "bereavement" fare to get me home. The flood of thoughts about all the things I hoped to accomplish that I couldn't share with him. The loneliness in the thought that he wouldn't be there to walk me down the aisle if I ever got married.

Fathers Day has been hard for me ever since my Dad passed away, which really isn't fair to my brother, my uncles and all my wonderful friends who are such terrific fathers to their own families. I always make a point to send handmade Mothers Day cards to my closest friends, yet I can never seem to muster that same creative energy for the men that are just as important. Although I did write a blog about my brother this time last year of which I'm very proud -- check out "Coach Dad" if you missed it the first time around.

My guilt over not being there when my Dad died is one of the defining things about my character as an adult. While my family has always been so supportive of me living my life as I choose, if I have one regret it is that I wasn't around more in the last years of his life. Especially because my Dad was always one of my biggest cheerleaders. He was a simple man who worked very hard to give me every opportunity he didn't have. I attended a college far more expensive for my family than other choices I had, but he and my mother sacrificed things they wanted so I could get the education I desired. I graduated from college largely debt free, and he was there to see it. And even though fancy words and grand speeches weren't his style, I know he was proud of me.

I also regret I never spent more time getting to know him. Of course, I knew plenty about his life but I never asked he important questions about who HE was.

What did he grow up wanting to be? What were his dreams? What kept him up at night? What would he change about his life if he could -- if he would even change anything? What was his greatest joy in life? What were his hopes for the future?

For those of you lucky enough to still have your father here on this Earth, cherish every moment with your Dad, even if he drives you crazy sometimes. Take nothing for granted. Find out who he is as a person. Never forget to tell him you love him.

And when the time comes and you need someone to talk to about how much you miss him, call me. I get it. And I have Kleenex. Trust me, you'll need it.

The "Happy File"

2011-06-18T20:43:00.000-07:00

Today I spent almost the entire day cleaning out my filing box. I went in it in the first place to find some of my lease paperwork because of an argument I'm having with my building manager. I found what I was looking for, but I also got frustrated looking at how disorganized the box had become, so I figured I'd pull it out of the bottom of the closet and go through it.

This photo is POST clean-out. It was full when I started.

I'm not the kind of person that hordes things. In fact, I regularly purge my closets and drawers for things I no longer use. But for some reason this box had escaped my attention for a while, and every time I had something new to file, I just sort of shoved it in and figured I'd get around to reorganizing another day. Today, the time had finally come so I dug in, and boy did I find some....well, interesting stuff.

Here are some of the random crazy things I saved for some reason.

Reboot discs from a laptop computer that hasn't worked since some time in 2000--and that I no longer have in my possession. Maybe the fact that it was still running Windows 95 was part of the problem.
An article on travel tips circa 19993. I think travel has become a little more sophisticated since then and I'm a sophisticated enough traveler not to need the article.
A couple of old drivers licenses featuring photos of me with REALLY BAD hair.
Maps of random places like Cary, NC. Clearly these are left over from the days before handheld GPS technology.
Instructions for assembling the Ikea "Morgondal" bed I bought in 1996. Since I've moved 4 times since I bought it, I think I've got the reassembly down without using the instructions.
Tax returns dating back to 1989. That means I have copies of every tax return since I was making enough money to file a tax return. Just in case you're curious, I was living LARGE in 1989 -- my adjusted gross income was $641. SWEET!
An article about having a paper trail ready in preparation for Y2K. Yes, I know that was almost 12 years ago...

But there is one thing I was glad I saved in that box -- my Happy File.

Back when I got my first "real" job out of college working for the March of Dimes Birth Defects Foundation, my first boss gave me some really fantastic advice I've followed to this day. She reminded me that bad days, problems and outright failures are part of work life. The trick she used to get her through those tough times was keeping a file of things that brought back good memories. Whenever she was having a tough day, she would flip through it to remind herself that bad times don't last forever and there are plenty of good times in the midst of the bad.

In fact, one of my happy file items is a photo of Gay and I, hanging out in a tent on the roof of a building overnight as part of a fundraiser we did once. I smiled instantly looking at that picture, which is exactly the point of a Happy File.

So while I did purge a lot of outright junk, I found some great things still worth saving. My next task is getting them converted to a digital format, but that is a project for another day.

For now, I'm sitting down for a visit with my Happy File and remembering happier times.

What is in YOUR Happy File?

Everything Is Better With Bacon

2011-06-17T21:25:00.000-07:00

I remember reading once that most of the flavor in food comes from fat, and bacon makes some of the best tasting fat around. That's probably why people are always making foods bacon flavored even if it doesn't seem natural at first glance.

I've heard rumors about chocolate covered bacon at state fairs and such, but it took a visit to Whole Foods for me to run into a real life bacon/chocolate combination.

Yes, it's a dark chocolate bar with little pieces of applewood smoked bacon melted into the chocolate. I bought one, ate it, and can confirm it is a quite tasty combination! And apparently it's a good seller because the fine folks at Vosges Haut Chocolate have an entire LINE of bacon-chocolate delicacies.

These look like great Father's Day gifts to me!

But more importantly, what is the most unusual bacon themed food YOU have ever eaten?

Five Things To Love About Chic Gamine

2011-06-16T19:37:00.000-07:00

If you read my earlier post about Marc Broussard's show at the El Rey Theatre, you heard me mention the Canadian group Chic Gamine, one of the opening acts. I was so impressed with their performance I hit up the merch table at the show and bought one of their CD's. After playing it all day at work, I'm more hocked than ever!

I took to the Internet to learn more about my favorite new discovery, so here are five things to love about Chic Gamine -- in addition to their music!

1) The name! "Chic" means stylish (of course) and "gamine" refers to, in the eloquent words of Wikipedia, "a slim, often boyish, wide-eyed young woman who is, or is perceived to be, mischievous, teasing or sexually appealing." These ladies have that vibe down!

2) They won a Juno Award (Canada's version of the Grammys) in 2009 for Best Roots & Traditional Album of the Year: Group. They were also nominated for a Juno again in 2011 and performed at the awards even though they didn't win.

3) Each of the members of the band wrote at least one song on their 2008 self-titled album, so they're all equally talented.

4) They write and perform songs in English AND French. C'est magnifique, no?

5) Marc Broussard discovered them at Strawberry Fest in Yosemite, CA and promptly asked them to join his West Coast tour.

Here's a quick video to get you ready to jump on the Chic Gamine bandwagon! Enjoy!

Marc Broussard at the El Rey Theatre

2011-06-15T21:31:00.000-07:00

The story of how I discovered Marc Broussard is a lesson in giving something a try even if you doubt it initially. Like actually listening to the music in a free compilation CD that comes attached to the spine of a fashion magazine.

Back in the days before social networking and the Internet ruled the world, Vanity Fair would insert a free CD in the pages of its annual music issue. Now those were days before musicians willingly gave tracks away for free, so you frequently assumed that the music on those CD's was free for a reason (like it wasn't very good). But against my better judgement I popped the CD into the car radio one week during a mind numbing commute and started listening. That's the first time I heard "Home."

Something about that soulful shuffle grabbed me and pulled me in. When I got to the office, I quickly popped out the disc to check the name of the artist -- Marc Broussard. I filed the information away in my brain with every intention of looking online for more of his music. Then I got busy at work and forgot about it.

Fast forward a few weeks, and I was on a business trip watching VH-1 and getting ready for work in the morning when heard the first strains of "Home." I turned to watch the video and got the shock of my life. When I first heard "Home" if you had asked what I thought Marc looked like just based on his voice, I would have said a heavy set black man in his late 40's. So imagine my surprise to see a dirty blonde, green eyed guy in his 20's singing good old fashioned soul music with a driving beat.

Then I was intrigued, picked up his first album Carenco at Tower Records, and heard that voice work magic on some pop music too. I've bought every album Marc Broussard has released since, but I've never seen him live until now.

Marc pulled a super classy move and came out to introduce the first act. Chic Gamine is a quartet based out of Winnipeg, Canada singing four party harmony with little else backing them but drums and a keyboard. Each of the ladies sings lead on different songs, and they sing in English AND French. They were unlike anything I've heard recently and are on my second look list starting NOW.

Next up was Matt Hires. He was one of the artists on the Mayercraft Carrier 2, and he's had a couple of minor hits. For the most part, he makes pleasant, unremarkable pop guitar music -- kind of a John Mayer lite without the guitar mojo. I felt a little sorry for him following Chic Gamine because they were so amazing his set felt like a bit of a letdown. Or you could call it musical palette cleanser before the main course.

One danger in knowing an artist's music too well is having lofty expectations when you see them live for the first time. This show a little frustrating for that reason. It was the first show of Marc's current West Coast tour and his new record was officially released the same day, so he had a few things on his mind. Technically, there were numerous problems with his guitar pedals and cables, which he even commented on as "first show issues." I wasn't impressed with the sound mix, and I don't think it was the club set-up. At points there was way too much bass, or the vocals were buried behind rest of the band.

But for all the lows, there were more than enough highs to make up for it. Marc shone most brightly on uptempo rockers like "Only Everything" and "Lucky" where he ditched his guitar and focused on singing and acting every bit the experienced front man. On most of the songs from Carencro, the crowd sang along happily. In the middle of the show, Marc did a solo acoustic section highlighted by the lovely ballad "Evangeline Rose" and enjoyed himself so much he waved the band off and did several more songs alone. Throughout the set, Chic Gamine carried back-up vocal duties beautifully.

On the whole, it was still a great show. Marc is a charismatic and passionate performer and he gave the crowd their moneys worth during his 2 hour set. I'd buy a ticket and see him again tomorrow if I could. Here is the set list, along with the album names for each song. Marc's music is definitely worth a listen if you're not already familiar.

"Rocksteady" - Carencro
"Save Me" - Carencro
"The Beauty of Who You Are" - Carencro
"Bleeding Heart" - Marc Broussard (2011)
"Only Everything"- Marc Broussard (2011)
"Lucky"- Marc Broussard (2011)
"Come Around" - Carencro
"Could You Believe - Marc Broussard- EP
"Yes Man" - Marc Broussard (2011)
"Let It All Out" - Marc Broussard (2011)
"Evangeline Rose" - Keep Coming Back
"Come In From the Cold" - Keep Coming Back
"Let Me Leave" - Carencro
"The Wanderer" - Carencro
"Let Me Do It Over" - Marc Broussard (2011)
"Home"- Carencro
****
Encore
"Hard Knocks" - Keep Coming Back
"Eye on the Prize" - Marc Broussard (2011)
"I Love You More Than You'll Ever Know - SOS

To learn more about Marc Broussard, including dates for his current tour, click here.

Kitchen Adventures: Saucy Problems

2011-06-12T22:10:00.000-07:00

One of the great joys of cooking is receiving a yummy recipe from a friend. Many times, it's a dish that is tied to an event you shared together, and every time you make it you feel some of the joy of that occasion all over again.

Unless you make it wrong.

My dear friend Michelle gave me a lovely gift when I moved into my current apartment. She put together a book with a number of her tried and true recipes since I was hoping to cook more in a kitchen I wasn't sharing with two other people.

One I'm glad she included was her Asparagus, Shrimp and Penne Pasta in Saffron Sauce. She first made it for me back when she was living in North Carolina. We were enjoying a rare girls weekend alone and it was a fabulous time. So I was really excited to take a stab at it myself.

Here are the ingredients:

2/3 cup white wine
1/4 tsp tightly packed saffron
2 lbs asparagus
1 lb shrimp
2 Tbsp olive oil
1/4 cup minced shallots
1 lb penne pasta
1 1/2 cup cream
3/4 cup chicken stock

And here are the steps:

1) Combine wine and saffron in small bowl and steep for at least 20 minutes. Then pour yourself a glass of wine for the rest of the process.
2) Trim asparagus, cook for 3 minutes then transfer to an ice bath.
3) Cook shrimp in olive oil with shallots until bright pink. Move shrimp to a bowl, leaving juices in pan.

4) Start penne pasta cooking.
5) Add saffron and wine mixture to shrimp skillet juices and boil until almost all liquid is gone. Then add cream and chicken stock and simmer over medium heat until mixture reduces by half (about 7 minutes).
6) Stir in asparagus and shrimp and simmer 2 more minutes.
7) Add salt and pepper to taste. Add sauce, shrimp and asparagus to pasta, stir and garnish with minced chives or Parmesan cheese (or both if you're me).

Now let's talk about what really happened.

Everything was great until I got to the sauce stage. I managed to get most of the liquid cooked out of the shrimp and shallot juice, but when I added the cream and chicken stock things went south. It cooked...and cooked...and cooked. It took close to 15 minutes to get it reduced by a third, and I was so hungry by that point I gave up, poured in the shrimp and asparagus and followed the rest of the directions.

It still tasted yummy, but the sauce wasn't the nice creamy consistency I remember it being when Michelle made it. So while I ate, I scratched my head and tried to figure out where I went wrong. I narrowed it down to a few possibilities.

1) I didn't cook enough of the liquid out of the shrimp juice.
2) I didn't use heavy enough cream. I bought whipping cream, but maybe I needed the HEAVY whipping cream.
3) I measured something wrong owing to my wine consumption during cooking.

Can anyone help me out here? I'd really love this recipe to work correctly so I can feed y'all the next time you come over.

And I promise not to drink all the wine next time...

Edwin McCain at The Canyon Club

2011-06-10T10:03:00.000-07:00

Ever since his massive hit "I'll Be" came on the scene in 1998, I've been a huge Edwin McCain fan. Born in South Carolina, he's a talented singer and songwriter who has been traveling the world for 20 years, banging out a solid career writing huge hits, touring with major acts and even playing small clubs solo while having a ball the whole time. He's one of the few artists whose record I'll buy without having heard a note and know it will be money well spent.

The last time I saw him live was at The House of Blues on the Sunset Strip. He was barefoot, relaxed and told some hilarious road trip stories of chance meetings with random strangers that inspired songs in the most unusual ways. This time, it was a different venue but the same old Edwin, every bit as relaxed and entertaining as ever.

His on-stage banter this time ran the gamut from hilarious when sharing a conversations with his wife - "Tour bus funny is NOT dinner party funny" -- to poignant when talking about his mother being diagnosed with cancer -- "Last May sucked..." But in true Edwin McCain form, even the bad news became content for a heartbreaking and beautiful song, delivered in that trademark soulful voice.

If you're interested in checking out some great music, here is a selection of some of my favorite songs from his Canyon Club set list. Just make sure you have a box of Kleenex handy, because you'll need it.

"Walk With You" - Single only (2008)
"I'll Be" - Misguided Roses (1997)
"Shooting Stars" - Scream And Whisper (2004)
"White Crosses" - Scream And Whisper (2004)
"I Could Not Ask For More" - Messenger (1999)

The night also had an unexpected bonus -- a short set by John Mayer's touring guitarist/singer David Ryan Harris!

I haven't seen David solo since my last John Mayer cruise, where he did a fantastic club set. You haven't lived until you've heard his great original/mash-up tune "Pretty Girl." If you're ever in the Los Angeles area, David is a regular at Hotel Cafe, so check his Facebook page for dates and get out to see the man. You can thank me later.

Thanks to Edwin and David for a great night of music!

Soothing Music

2011-06-08T18:35:00.000-07:00

I was having a really great day when an unexpected bomb dropped on me and blew the last few hours to pieces. I won't get into the details about the bomb in question now because that is a topic for a whole other blog post. A LONG blog post.

Everyone responds to stress in a different way. I like the neatness and order of my apartment too much to throw things. I don't get a sudden urge to jump on the elliptical trainer or start sprinting down the street for a run to take out my frustration. I don't have the attention span needed to meditate effectively. So I normally find the closest food containing sugar or chocolate and inhale it to feel better.

I was reaching for my unopened pint of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia when a friend I was chatting with online suggested I put on some soothing music instead. Now I have playlists for lots of things already created in iTunes, but relaxation was not one of those. So I pulled up the first album from my collection I knew would be guaranteed to mellow me out and put me in a good mood.

There is just something about Carole and James. Classic songs in acoustic style make everything better. These two are smiling because they know how good it is. I'm glad they do what they do, because within seconds of "You've Got A Friend" staring to play, my attitude changed completely.

But I didn't stop there, and I found some other great albums in my collection for my newly created "Soothing Music" playlist. Here are some of my other favorites:

Diana Krall - "The Girl In The Other Room"
Carole King - "Tapestry"
Breathe - "Peace of Mind"
George Winston - "Winter Into Spring," "Autumn," "Forest," and "Summer"
The Swell Season - "Strict Joy"
"Once (Music From The Motion Picture)"
Elton John - "Live In Australia" and "Love Songs"

What music takes you to your peaceful, happy place?

Kitchen Adventures: Look Ma, No Recipe!

2011-06-07T20:44:00.000-07:00

I'm working to get more vegetables into my diet, and during an open call for recipes on my social media networks, my good friend Tanya reminded me about stir frying.

Shortly after I graduated from college, I actually bought a real wok. One that you had to season properly and cook with on correct heat settings, etc. So I was pretty much a failure in my early stir fry attempts, and the wok found the trash can once I managed to ruin it.

The other issue I had learning to stir fry was my lack of a basic understanding of the sizes you needed to chop food into so it got cooked through but not too done. And the order to cook hings in, like cooking heavier veggies like broccoli first because they take more time to get done than snow peas. I realize now it's not hard, but when you're in your 20's, busy trying to be professional party girl and meet as many boys as possible, the logic portion of your brain doesn't engage long when it comes to boring subjects like cooking.

But when I went to the market yesterday, it was beautiful sunny weather and the produce at the store was looking good, so I threw caution to the wind, picked some stuff that looked pretty and headed home determined to make a success out of stir frying -- even without a recipe as a guide.

As much as I love veggies, I hate the time it takes to prep them (probably why I haven't made much stir fry lately...okay EVER). But with the help of a nice glass of wine and a phone call to distract me while I was chopping, I hacked up enough veg for what should be one week of dinners.

Last night my veggie selection was carrots, red and green peppers, yellow squash and broccoli prepared in teriyaki sauce with some noodles added since I didn't have any protein included.

Rice noodles were a new experiment for me as well. You have to boil them for about 8 minutes before using them in your dish, which turned out to be the perfect amount of time to get the veggies to cook.

I have to admit, it was pretty damn good and I was proud of myself. I probably made enough for two people, so I need to work on my portions a bit. All in all, I give it a big thumbs up!

Now I'll probably be stir frying until I'm sick an tired of veggies. But I think that's a good problem to have.

Reorganizing Creatively

2011-06-06T22:08:00.000-07:00

I used to scrapbook -- a lot. Ever since I moved, I don't do it much any more. That was two years ago. I've realized lately that I miss that part of my creative life, so I started thinking about why I've abandoned it for so long.

Nothing like seeing fun stuff in your favorite scrapbook store to get the creativity going.

A big part of the issue is space. Granted, in the entire time I've been scrapping I've never had a dedicated space just for my projects. I've always worked on counter tops, the floor, empty tables in corners of rooms and such. But downsizing to a studio apartment -- the smallest space I've ever inhabited -- took finding room to work to a whole new level. Since I don't have space to store all my supplies within easy reach, everything got packed into a closet. That meant pulling out a slew of bags, boxes and containers every time I wanted to work on something -- and putting it all back.

So I started thinking about how to address my space issues and came up with the idea of a rolling cart that would hold the stuff I need on every project -- stamps, ink, embellishments, cutters, punches, stencils, adhesives, etc. If I could just get those supplies easier to access and put away, I could get my creative mojo back.

I decided this would help solve the problem.

I can roll it up next to the dining room table when I'm working on something, then roll it right back. Much easier than pulling all of this stuff out of the closet to find what I need.

The next piece of the challenge was getting as much of this pile as possible into the new rolling storage. It's still a work in progress even after spending a whole day working through this pile. The bad news is it won't all fit right now. The good news is the stuff that doesn't fit is consumable and will get used as I'm working through my growing list of projects. I think I'm off to the right start.

As an added bonus, going through all of those containers helped me remember how many cool tools I had I'd forgotten about, so I have a new crop of ideas in my head about what to make!

Now to reorganize all my photos so I have something to scrap...

Looking Back On My Life in CAT Mode

2011-06-05T10:19:00.000-07:00

A wise friend once told me never to make a decision when you're hungry, tired or stressed. That explains why I never wrote very much during my work duty in Tennessee, because I was one or all of those three things at various moments. Actually, I should correct that. I wrote quite a bit. I just never published any of my posts.

The writing I did on the road was very in the moment, full of the emotions and daily frustrations of doing a tough job under difficult circumstances. It was cathartic to get those emotions out and not carry them from one day to the next. Expelling that emotion, along with the demands of my every day life during those weeks in Tennessee, left me mentally and physically exhausted. For a large portion of my stay, as one day led to another just like it, I felt like the Dunkin' Donuts guy....

Looking back now on what I wrote during that time, I realize I spent a lot of time thinking in very selfish terms about how I was feeling instead of focusing on the positives of the experience. I got nothing but incredible support from my co-workers. We had lots of laughs in spite of the stress we were all under. And while there were a few challenging people, our customers were amazing and so grateful we came to help. I'll never forget the woman who stepped out of her car when I greeter her, looked me square in the eyes when she handed me her keys and said "Thank you for being here."

I learned a few practical life lessons too.

Hail can really mess up a car. This used to be a convertible top. Ouch.

Working in close quarters actually brings out the best in people. When you're sharing power cords, cameras, printers and everything else, you learn pretty quickly to get along or it's going to be a VERY long day. We all pretty much took the attitude that the sooner everyone jumped on a task, the sooner we all got to leave. Teamwork is a beautiful thing.

Looking at a laptop that doesn't reflect local time is a double edged sword. In the morning, you feel like you're up even earlier than you need to be, but later in the day you start thinking you have plenty of time ahead of you until you discover you're exhausted because it's really 3 hours later. I need to learn how to change my laptop settings.

Everything takes twice as long when it rains, but cool weather is better than hot when you're on your feet for 11-12 hours a day.

Improvised body shop environments can be lots of fun paired with an iPhone and an Instagram app. When I was at my wits end and needed a break, I'd slip away for a few minutes and find something to photograph. I took a lot of pictures.

Most of all, I'm glad I listened to my friend and held off on hitting the publish button before the time was right. Looking back, life in CAT mode wasn't so bad after all....

Kitchen Adventures: Copy and Steal Everything

2011-05-30T20:46:00.000-07:00

My cooking skills are pretty limited unless I have a recipe to follow. I've always wanted to be one of those people that could just grab a bunch of stuff out of the fridge and make it into something, but I don't have enough base cooking knowledge or experience to make that happen -- at least not yet.

So in trying to branch out my ability to experiment in the kitchen, I thought the best place to start would be taking a component of a recipe I knew worked and trying to do something else with it. The Ina Garten pasta salad recipe I did the other day worked out so well, and I had left over ingredients, so I thought that would be a good place to start.

I took the basic formula for the dressing from Ina's pasta recipe and quadrupled it to make sure I had enough to marinate 5 boneless, skinned chicken breasts. In hindsight, I probably could have gotten by with tripling it. Depending on how much chicken you're cooking, you can decide what proportion to use.

Here are the base level amounts of everything before you multiply the recipe.

5 sun-dried tomatoes in oil, drained
2 tablespoons red wine vinegar
6 tablespoons good olive oil
1 garlic clove, diced
1 teaspoon capers, drained
2 teaspoons kosher salt
3/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

I marinated the chicken for 30 minutes in the refrigerator, then put the chicken in a baking pan and spooned some of the marinade over each breast.

Thirty minutes in a 350 degree oven later, I had some nice baked chicken to serve over pasta!

So the experiment was a success, and I have a new recipe in my repertoire. Now I just need to work on my plating skills...

Kitchen Adventures: From TV To Table

2011-05-27T23:21:00.000-07:00

I spent a lot of my non-working time during CAT duty watching TV. Since the hotel had neither HBO nor Versus (hockey play-offs), I mainly switched back and forth between Showtime and The Food Network. There is nothing like eating boxed sandwiches and fast food for 3 weeks straight to make you yearn for REAL food.

One afternoon I was tuned in to "The Barefoot Contessa", watching Ina Garten make a beautiful pasta salad with several of my favorite ingredients, and I resolved to look up the recipe and try it some time this summer. Who doesn't love a nice pasta salad for a casual meal outside?

Normally, I would find the recipe, save it in a folder in my computer and never get back to it. But one of my resolutions for this summer is to actually cook more and not have the majority of my meals come from a microwave. So I looked up the recipe online and decided to make it for the weekend so I had something nice to munch on that I could spread out over several days.

And since nothing says summer like a nicely chilled Riesling, I chucked a bottle of Chateau Ste. Michelle in the shopping cart to go along with my meal.

After the wine had ample time to chill, I poured myself a glass, started up Sideways on the DVD player (my favorite movie to cook by!) and assembled the fixings for Ina's Tomato Feta Pasta Salad.

The recipe is very simple, with an incredible flavor that comes mostly from the dressing, a mixture of olive oil, red wine vinegar, garlic, capers and sun-dried tomatoes. And you get to make the dressing in a food processor, one of the simple joys of cooking (at least for me).

Before processing....

...and After Processing!

After the pasta cooks and you chop the other ingredients, you toss the whole shebang together and it has everything most pasta salads don't -- terrific color, pleasing texture and great flavor!

Voila!

What are you eating this weekend?

Urgent, Important or Neither

2011-05-26T18:23:00.000-07:00

My return to real life slapped me square in the face on my first day back to the office. Somehow all my work and personal to-do lists were suddenly screaming at me simultaneously, reminding me how behind in LIFE I am right now.

Somehow the car went to service level DEFCON 1 in 24 hours...

I used to help teach a class for managers that included a component on time management. The key concept was the time tested Franklin Covey developed "Urgent/Important Matrix", which is a tool you can use to decide how to budget your time. Sounds like something that could be helpful in a situation like this, right?

Courtesy Merrill and Covey - "First Things First" (1994) via Wikipedia

This time, not so much. It's a great tool for normal everyday planning. But sometimes you need an even simpler process to help you feel better about having too much to do and not enough hours in the day. So here's a simple list I developed to help set some REAL priorities.

If you don't get "X" done today....
1) Will someone die (including you)?
2) Do you risk imprisonment?
3) Will it cost you more money if you wait?

If the answer to all of the above questions is no, it doesn't HAVE to get done today. So take a deep breath, open a nice beverage of your choosing and relax. It will all get done eventually, and if it doesn't it probably wasn't urgent or important enough to matter much anyway.

In case you're wondering, nothing on my list required a "yes" answer. Now where is the wine opener?

Getting Back To Normal

2011-05-24T19:59:00.000-07:00

After working 21 days with only 1 day off, I got to enjoy 3 days of solitude before heading back to work.

I was so happy to be home I didn't leave the house for the first two days, and I only partially unpacked. They say you can't store up on sleep, but I gave it my best shot by rising late and taking frequent naps, with a few meals and some internet time in between.

By today -- day 3 -- I realized I had better get my butt in gear and face the world again. That meant finally unpacking, doing laundry and making a list of errands and shopping I needed to accomplish to start getting back in the swing of things. Frankly, the list was so long it made me want to crawl right back into bed and avoid it all for one more day.

Laundry and unpacking somehow turned into a minor closet reorganization and Goodwill purge. For someone who isn't a very casual dresser, I own more t-shirts than most guys I know, and two large bags headed out to the nearest donation bin. For a second I debated on keeping them for workout clothes, then I realized I wear the same stuff over and over again to the gym and I'd never worn any of the things I was pitching. Not to mention the fact that my last gym visit was....let's not go there. I feel awful enough already.

With that done, I ventured out. My first surprise was realizing the last time I left my car, I had put the top up but forgot to close the windows. They were open the entire 3 weeks I was gone. Thank goodness for covered, gated and security monitored parking or I'd probably be dealing with a stolen car.

I started it up, and of course the tire pressure light went on, followed by a reminder that I'm due for my 30,000 mile maintenance.

Going out was supposed to remove things from the to-do list, but now I was adding. At least gas is about 10 cents LESS a gallon than when I left.

After getting air in my tires and gas in the car, I stopped by Kovacs Luggage to get the broken wheel on my computer bag replaced. I've had that bag 8 years with no issues, so it was about time for a wheel to go. I'd also been considering looking at new bags since I carry 2 laptops on my work trips, so I poked around the store a bit after I dropped off my bag. I must have been destined for something new, because I found one on sale -- and it's purple to boot!

Maybe re-entry to the real world wouldn't be so bad after all.

Next I headed to Michael's Crafts to look for a scrapbook for a project I'm working on. Everything they had was 25% off, almost like they knew I was coming. I love it when a plan comes together! Finish the day with a much-needed pedicure and some ice cream, and life is back on the upswing!

At least until I take another look at my to-do list. I think I'll put that off until tomorrow....

The Long Journey Home

2011-05-21T23:03:00.000-07:00

I've never been able to figure out why traveling home from any trip is always more arduous than the journey getting there.

If it's a pleasure trip, you're no longer looking forward to a big adventure so the excitement is gone. If it's business, you're probably more tired from working your butt off, which means you have less patience when problems crop up. Whatever the reason, finding your way back home is exhausting.

All the permanent CAT reps talk about the "Going Home Giddiness" you feel on your last day of duty. I think I felt it a little early, which caused me to book an early morning flight. Or maybe I just wanted to get the heck out of dodge, if you know what I mean.

But being up so early seemed to guarantee little snags in my travel all morning. Like having to walk all the way back to the rental car drop off after learning there was no live person to check in my GPS unit (why a rental car company uses portable GPS units is beyond me...).

Or having to shepherd a woman without glasses and no experience through the US Airways electronic check-in process because the ticket agents were too rude to help her get to the funeral she was attending in Baton Rouge. If there is a Rapture, those US Airways folks earned their spot in hell. I, on the other hand, probably saved myself by helping that poor woman.

It certainly didn't help that I was doing all this dragging a computer bag with a broken wheel as its loud "clackety-clack" noises made every head around me turn and look at me like I was disturbing the balance of the universe.

I've never been more excited to get back to the craziness of Los Angeles. I want my life back.

On The Loss of a Friend

2011-05-19T21:24:00.000-07:00

The older I get, the more I've learned to accept that life comes with loss. Some losses are expected, like the death of a parent. Others are like a sucker punch, taking your breath away and leaving you empty, with only questions and no answers to explain why bad things happen to good people.

The loss of a friend, especially one your age, stops you cold and makes you examine your life. Are you doing enough personally and professionally? Are you giving enough of yourself to the issues you care about? Are you wasting time chasing things that aren't important instead of spending it with the people you love?

I started confronting these questions when my friend Jon Moncrief passed away May 19th at the far-too-young age of 43, the victim of pulmonary thrombosis - a clot in his lungs which made him unable to breathe and suddenly ended his life. I haven't stopped thinking about him, and those issues, ever since.

Jon was one of the many friends I've made through hockey. We met at a Kings tweet-up at at the 2009 draft where I shared my love of the game and Jon shared his considerable knowledge about the sport.

What a Tweet-up crew!

He was a sportswriter by trade and a sports fanatic for fun. Unlike some people who write about sports for a living, when you had a conversation with Jon he always spent as much time listening to what you had to say as trying to dazzle you with his insight. It's not because he didn't have any. What I know about hockey could fit into a thimble compared to the vast knowledge and experience Jon had to share. He listened because he was genuinely interested in other people, and despite the objectivity required by his job, he enjoyed sharing his unbridled love of the sport.

During the Kings season, Jon and I had a little routine. He would come down from the press box and meet me on the concourse to chat about the game and dissect what we thought the Kings need to do differently. Sometimes other friends joined us, and sometimes it was just Jon and me. No matter what the game outcome, it was always fun because of those visits.

But the special thing about Jon is that his interest in people went beyond sports. He was a true and genuine friend who would text or call you out of the blue just to say hello and see how you were doing. Jon understood what was important in life and committed his time and energy to doing what he loved and looking after the people important to him. He was truly an example of someone who spent his time LIVING. He knew how to focus on what mattered even when real world problems threatened to get in the way.

I am grateful for the friendship we shared, on and off the ice. I know for certain I will never attend a Kings game again that I don't think of him and miss him terribly. I can still hear his laugh echoing in my head. I already miss his smile and his good-bye hugs.

I was watching "The Bucket List" on my day off last week, a few days before I learned of Jon's death. In the movie, the two main characters are sitting on top of a pyramid discussing the ancient Egyptians' beliefs about entry into heaven, and thinking of that movie scene now makes me think of Jon.

Morgan Freeman's character Carter shares this message with Jack Nicholson's Edward:

"You know, the ancient Egyptians had a beautiful belief about death. When their souls got to the entrance to heaven, the guards asked two questions. Their answers determined whether they were able to enter or not. 'Have you found joy in your life? Has your life brought joy to others?'"

Jon Moncrief would be able to say yes to both those questions. Heaven is a friendlier place with him in it. And the sports talk is certainly better.

Rest in peace, my friend.

Finally, A Break

2011-05-15T19:34:00.000-07:00

Thirteen days. Three hundred and twelve hours. Eighteen thousand seven hundred and twenty minutes. That's how long it's been since my last day off from work. I'm physically and mentally spent, and this break could not come at a better time.

As I thought about what to do with a day to myself, I was initially determined not to be a total slug and get out to enjoy some local sights. I even bought a map, thinking a drive into the Great Smoky Mountains would provide some nice photo opportunities.

Then the weather turned gray and windy, with rain forecasted off and on for the entire weekend. I got a slightly sore throat, which developed into a cough. And when I woke up to a silenced alarm clock for the first time in almost two weeks, I felt no desire other than to crawl back in bed and sleep some more. I got up long enough to enjoy the complimentary hotel breakfast, put the "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door and grab the TV remote before getting back to the business of resting. The only other time I got up the entire day was to walk to the Applebee's across the street to pick up dinner.

Only 5 more days left. With a little luck, I might just make it.

Life On The Road and The Joy of Laundry

2011-05-12T23:44:00.000-07:00

Before I left for CAT duty, I had to go shopping. Since I don't work in the field on a regular basis, my wardrobe of dresses and skirts wasn't going to cut the mustard for this particular assignment. But even having secured more black pants and polo shirts suitable for long days working around cars, there was still no way to have enough wardrobe for 3 weeks of work, which meant several of my evenings would be spent doing laundry.

The hotel has a valet laundry service, but since I was on my own dime I wasn't about to pay $5 for a pair of pants to get cleaned. That meant finding a Laundromat.

Luckily, I spotted one a couple of miles down the road from the hotel my first day here. It sits next to a small apartment complex with weekly rates, which makes for very entertaining people watching if you're bored while the wash cycle runs. I was even more happy to find the washers and dryers are exactly the same as my building at home so at least I knew what to expect.

I also discovered a handy new laundry invention at the local Walmart--detergent and fabric softener in one sheet! Easy to use in a pinch, and cheaper than buying even the smallest size of each item separately.

The laundry facilities were great. The vending machine that stole my money? Well, that's another story...

Take Me Away

2011-05-11T19:55:00.000-07:00

The site I've been working at in Knoxville is less than a mile from the airport. It sits right in the flight path to the runway, so all day long I watch planes, large and small, fly over my head.

The noise makes it difficult talking to customers, but that isn't the hardest part of their daily invasion. The hardest part is the reminder of how far away I am from my life and the things and people I love.

Right now, all I want is a plane to take me home...

Life, Reality and Best Laid Plans

2011-05-01T06:45:00.000-07:00

You've all heard the quote "Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans." With the Kings season over, along with my vacation, I was making lots of plans for how I would spend a quiet month of May at home, cooking and catching up on all my creative projects.

When your boss calls you at 6:30 AM on a Friday, you know it can't be for a good reason. Sure enough, my company had raised an alert for assistance with the increasing number of claims coming in due to the recent storms in the Southeast. Could I volunteer for 3 weeks of duty?

As much as I would rather be at home making scrapbooks, I couldn't say no and volunteered to help. After all, I am so fortunate to have a roof over my head, my personal belongings intact and my car undamaged. So many people suffering from this storm DON'T have that. Giving 3 weeks of my time to help handle their claims is the absolute least I can do.

Volunteering for duty basically meant dropping everything and getting ready to spend three weeks on the road -- with slightly more than 24 hours to get ready for departure. So I spent a portion of the day running errands, including some last minute shopping for things I'll need in the field.

It also meant doing a whole host of things around the house. I'm one of those neurotic people that has to clean, do all the laundry and make sure the house is completely picked up before I go anywhere. I just can't stand the idea of coming home after a long trip and feeling like I already have a pile of work in front of me.

I'll do my best to keep things updated personally while I'm on the road, but working 12 hours days may make that a challenge. So if you don't see me around the blogosphere much, just know I haven't disappeared for good.

My best laid plans will still be there waiting when I get home...they're just on hold for a bit.

Crazy Kitchen Adventures (aka The Fridge Clean Out)

2011-04-30T10:47:00.000-07:00

I'm not a very smart grocery shopper sometimes. Even though I go in to the store with a list and a general plan for what I'm doing, I don't stick completely to the plan and end up with more food than I need. Or sometimes I end up not liking the idea of what I wanted to make, and the ingredients sit there, staring at me, reminding my I'd better do something with them before they go bad.

I hate the idea of wasting food, so that means being open to a little bit of experimentation. Last night's adventure ingredients were white bread, left over spaghetti sauce and mozzarella cheese from the lasagna I made 3 weeks ago.

Baked in the oven for 18 minutes at 350 degrees -- Impromptu cheese pizza!

Looks good enough, so how did it taste? Just OK. It was a little soggy in the middle. Maybe I put too much sauce. Maybe I needed to toast the bread first. Maybe I should have baked it longer, but the edges were the right amount of toasty, so maybe not.

I'll get another crack at it today since I'm STILL cleaning out the fridge. Any ideas what can you do creatively with a bag of carrots?

Why I Won't Be Watching The Royal Wedding

2011-04-28T22:15:00.000-07:00

I've been to a lot of weddings in my life. Growing up, we lived next door to a very large family and I was the go-to choice of flower girl in several Sarnecky weddings. I've been a bridesmaid for high school and college friends. In 2005 alone, I attended three weddings in the space of 4 months! From the largest to the most intimate, each event has been different in it's own way, but they also all have one thing in common.

I've cried at every one. (OK, maybe not the early flower girl appearances, but at all the others)

Weddings are emotional for me because you're celebrating someone you care about finding LOVE. We all want to find that happiness in life, and when you witness it happening, it's like magic. That magic is what makes the occasion special, whether it's celebrated standing barefoot on a beach with only a handful people in attendance or in a grand ballroom with dinner for served to hundreds.

I don't know Prince William or Catherine Middleton, so while I could appreciate the beauty of their day on one level, for me it's little more than an elaborately staged piece of theatre. Many of the details have been released in advance, which while understandable giving their standing as public figures also takes away from the spontaneity of the event. When Prince Charles and Princess Diana were married on my birthday in 1981 I watched on TV, and it seemed like something out of a movie, not a real wedding.

Real weddings have perfect unplanned moments like a bride snagging her veil walking down a wooden staircase and gracefully lifting her arm to free it as I caught a photo of the wide, beautiful smile on her face. Or a groom getting choked up reading the vows he wrote especially for the woman who is still the love of his life.

You don't need to be royalty to be Princes and Princesses of your own love story. Just enjoy your fairy tale on your own terms.

Rough Re-Entry

2011-04-26T22:08:00.000-07:00

The first day back to reality after an idyllic vacation is never fun. My return came with a double whammy as my beloved Kings were booted out of the Stanley Cup Playoffs in overtime during Game 6 -- AT HOME. WITH ME SITTING THERE WATCHING. LIVE.

Even my magic tiara wasn't enough to secure a win.

When your team suffers, you suffer along with them. And when I suffer, I eat. So drowning my sorrows in an enormous bowl of ice cream was the only thing that made sense when I got home from the game last night.

Now that my vacation and my hockey season are over, it's not only time to get back to work...it's time to get back in the gym.

I'm still a work in progress...

Vacation: Day 14

2011-04-24T22:22:00.000-07:00

I think I've cooked more this vacation than I have in the past 2 years of day-to-day living, so it was fitting to end my magical two weeks off with food and friends. Easter Dinner at the Donat's house, followed by an entire evening of playoff hockey watching. I contributed spinach balls and homemade hot mustard to the cause. Everyone including the dogs were fat and happy by the end of the evening. Leftovers will get my week started right.

My only regret is this adventure coming to an end...

Vacation: Day 13

2011-04-24T11:54:00.000-07:00

It wasn't about wearing the right jersey. Or my playoff nail color. Or lucky jewelry. It was about do or die, win or go home.

Plain. Simple. Playoff hockey. My Kings played it well in San Jose.

On to Game 6 back at home. GO KINGS GO!

Vacation: Day 12

2011-04-23T09:43:00.000-07:00

A perfect day at the beach. Remembering the joy of carnival rides. Appreciating the view from high above the Santa Monica Pier on a Ferris Wheel. Feeling the wind in my hair and the sun on my face. Life doesn't get any better than this.

Truly a Good Friday....

Vacation: Day 11

2011-04-22T19:35:00.000-07:00

Things you don't want to feel on vacation....

Sad. Disappointed. Depressed. Anxious. Panicked. Frustrated. Annoyed. Fearful. Helpless. Desperate.

But I'm a Kings fan, and a playoff vacation includes those feelings. I hope they stop soon. Please win the next one boys.

Vacation: Day 10

2011-04-21T16:13:00.000-07:00

The hockey mania portion of my vacation continued with a second trip back to Phoenix for Game 4 of the Coyotes-Red Wings series.

I knew I couldn't handle another 10 hours in the car, so I got to visit my home away from home--the Burbank Airport! Along the journey from California to Coyoteville, I took a bunch of totally random photos of things that struck my fancy. I need a cure for my Instagram addiction...

Sadly, the Coyotes lost the game and the series. It was a unique experience being there for not only the end of their season, but possibly the end of their tenure in Phoenix. My heart aches for all the Coyotes fans that desperately love their team. They showed it loud and proud last night, and I hope the team ownership situation gets resolved in their favor. I would want the same if this mess was happening to my Kings.

And I have to give respect to any team that puts the Kings on a wall in their arena....

Vacation: Day 9

2011-04-20T09:47:00.000-07:00

As much as I've been enjoying every aspect of my vacation, I have to admit I was looking forward to the Kings first home 2011 Stanley Cup playoff game most of all.

Game face!

There is truly nothing better than the electric atmosphere of playoff hockey, especially when you share it with great friends.

We love our rally towels!


The Hart Family


Me and my girls!

The boys!

Kings fans know how to celebrate!

The Kings completely dominated the game at the beginning, then proceeded to give it away in a truly heartbreaking overtime loss.

Where did our defense go?

But I still love my boys, and I can't think of any place I would have rather been today. GO KINGS!

Vacation: Day 8

2011-04-19T07:36:00.000-07:00

Until now, the only difficulties in my vacation were little things like trees downed over hiking paths and traffic. Car trouble is more than a little problem, especially when it involves not having air conditioning for a second 5 hour drive back through the desert.

Luckily Volkswagen cares about it's customers and I found a dealer 10 minutes from my hotel. It meant getting up early, but the problem got resolved.

With that little issue taken care of, I was able to enjoy a very unusual hockey play-off experience - my first Phoenix Coyotes "White Out."

I'm just lucky I managed to survive...

I think Shane Doan tried to kill me while I was watching warmups...

Vacation: Day 7

2011-04-18T08:07:00.000-07:00

I followed my day at the beach with a journey in the extreme opposite direction. Driving 5 hours east across the desert is a great way to clear your mind. Nothing but open road and triple digit temperatures with Michael Jackson's "Speed Demon" playing on the iPod. At least until you arrive at the unfortunate road block. Life throws those at you when you're least expecting them.

As you spend a brutal final hour struggling to reach your destination, you think past the immediate problem and focus on what really matters. And even though your first inclination is to just give up and go back, you know what lies ahead will make the journey worth it.

Vacation: Day 6

2011-04-17T11:22:00.000-07:00

I've been going to the beach ever since I was a little girl. Whether it's on the East Coast or the West Coast, something about sand, waves and sunshine always makes me feel like I don't have a care in the world.

It's even better when you can finish your time at the beach with something to cool off and front row seats to watch your hockey team get a huge win.

Vacation is the best!

Vacation: Day 5

2011-04-16T14:19:00.000-07:00

A great vacation day starts with a great breakfast.

You can't go wrong with chocolate chip pancakes and bacon, right?

Then you drive up into the hills and look to the skies for inspiration.

Griffith Park Observatory

Then your beautiful day ends by celebrating America's past time the right way...by stuffing your face again. Because when you're on vacation, calories don't count.

Dodger Dog!

Me being a pig

Fans on the field at Dodger Stadium preparing for the fireworks show.

Vacation: Day 4

2011-04-15T07:57:00.000-07:00

I'm not a regularly "outdoorsy" person, but I enjoy a good hike every now and then. Yesterday I attacked Mt. Baldy. The trail was rocky at times and difficult to navigate because of some recently fallen trees, but the views were worth it.

Hiking is kind of like life that way, I guess....

Vacation: Day 3

2011-04-14T07:51:00.000-07:00

Being a tourist in your own city is fun. Why did I wait until now to do it?

Hollywood is madness. It's also the home of memories set in stone.

Stars hand and footprints at Grauman's Chinese Theatre

There is natural beauty a stones throw from the madness. You just need to drive up Beachwood Canyon to find it.

The view from Hollywood Trail

The drive into nature gets you closer to an icon, and for a moment you feel like the world is your oyster.

The Hollywood Sign

And even when you have to snap back to reality for a moment, it can be sweet.

Vacation: Day 2

2011-04-13T08:43:00.000-07:00

Things I learned on my second day of vacation.

1) Being a glamazon is fun!

2) You can find inspiration anywhere.

3) Getting flowers out of the blue will make your day every time.

4) Food is better when it's homemade and shared.

5) Downtown LA is a pretty beautiful place to live...especially at night.

Vacation: Day 1

2011-04-11T22:33:00.000-07:00

A cool beginning...

Kings Practice - El Segundo

A colorful middle...

Fresh Pedicure - Pasadena

And a very sweet ending....

Homemade Chocolate Chip Cookies - Downtown Los Angeles

Taking a REAL Break

2011-04-10T09:42:00.000-07:00

Over the next two weeks, I am taking a much needed vacation of the best kind. I'm not flying off to Europe, sitting on a beach in Mexico or hopping a cruise liner to exotic ports of call. Those kinds of vacations are fantastic and I enjoy them very much, but frankly they're work in their own way. If you've done any of those kind of trips before, you know what I mean.

This time, I'm staying home. Well, mostly. There may be some local road trips here and there. You just never know what I have up my sleeve, and I want to be able to share it with you. I'm also determined to get time away from my laptop and get out and actually LIVE a bit.

With that idea in mind, my blogs over the next two weeks will be inspired by Project 365. I'll post at least one photo every day of my vacation. Text will be minimal for two reasons. First, it's more fun to let to photos tell the story. Second, I'll enjoy my vacation more if I don't spend all my time writing about it.

To give you a little taste of how this works, here's a series of "Day In The Life" photos I shot yesterday...

I hope you enjoy my little experiment. I can't wait to see where life takes me for 2 weeks!

Why I Keep Blogging

2011-04-09T14:06:00.000-07:00

Writing is hard work. Even when you find an inspiring topic, getting the thoughts, pictures and sounds in your head translated to words is ever easy. Making those words inspire other people is even harder.

There have been so many times in the past year I've considered not blogging any more. It's easier to share a quick thought or a photo on a social networking site than take the time to turn it into something more meaningful. But it always seems just when I'm ready to give up, the universe sends me inspiration to keep going.


I may not know exactly where I'm going, but I'll get there eventually...

I got a note today from a college friend. Her son needed to start a blog and didn't know how. She had seen my blog, checked out Blogger and it became the answer her son needed.

Everything you send out into the universe travels like a ripple on a pond. Even though you can't always see where it ends up, it impacts something or someone. For that chance, I'll keep battling to find the right words to share my story. If it helps just one other person want to share theirs, it was worth every moment I spent.

Taking A Break

2011-04-05T22:06:00.000-07:00

Today was one of "those" days. You know, the ones where everything seems like an uphill battle. I had a couple of big reports to finish and my computer locked up on me twice. I had to rework a bunch of data in an enormous spreadsheet that kept acting buggy. On top of all that, I was cold.

You see, it's starting to get nice and sunny here in Southern California. And when it warms up outside, the building I work in becomes an ice box. I have a sweater permanently draped over the back of my office chair just for this reason, but today it wasn't helping. I had eaten lunch at my desk so I could keep working away on my reports, and there was no reason for me to go downstairs. But being cold was making me start to lose my concentration. So even though time was not on my side and I still had way to much work to do, I decided to take a break and go outside for a bit to see if I could get warmed up.

It's amazing what sunshine and fresh air can do to improve your outlook. I debated for a few minutes about going back upstairs to get my laptop and wireless card so I could work outside! Instead, I took 15 minutes and just sat on a bench with my eyes closed, feeling the sun warm my face.

Sometimes 15 minutes of peacefulness is all you need to get your second wind.

If You Could Start All Over

2011-03-30T21:55:00.000-07:00

One of my girlfriends posed an interesting question on Facebook a few weeks back that got me thinking.

If you could clear your slate (in other words, no obstacles in the way) and start again to follow your passion, what career would you pursue?

Growing up, we all have dreams of what we want to become when we're older. Our dreams as children are idyllic and limitless. We don't have the pressure of boundaries and expectations we start to carry around as adults. We dream about being athletes, ballerinas, artists, actors, models, astronauts or rock stars -- things that sound glamorous because as children, we don't know what those roles are really like. We only know the idealized view of them society gives us.

It was interesting reading through the responses my friend received. A lot of people went right back to those childhood dreams and listed one as their great passion in life. My first instinct was to do the same, but I think I've been an adult too long because I censored myself and tried to come up with something I'm passionate about but could still be a "realistic" career for me. I love taking photographs and I love writing, so photographer and writer would have made great sounding responses. I can't even remember what I chose to post, but I just remember thinking what I answered wasn't really truthful.

If I'm really honest with myself, what I would love to be if I could start over is an organizational expert.

THIS makes me happy.

As everyone in my family and even my closest friends can attest, I've been rearranging stuff my entire life. When I'm stressed out, I clean closets. I reorganize cabinets. Shopping in a container store is sheer nirvana. It's the best way I know to get out of a funk, get your mind back on track and regain control of your life. I would love to make a career out of helping other people find peace through eliminating clutter from their lives. Maybe one day I'll figure out a way to make money doing it.

What career would you choose if you could start over?

Perspective

2011-03-29T22:34:00.000-07:00

Artists have a totally different view of the world from most people. They don't see boundaries or limits, they are not confined by expectations or norms of behavior. They only see possibilities, opportunities and unique points of view.

It takes a true artist to imagine that stainless steel, aluminum tubing and punching bags can come together and create beauty.

It takes an even bigger artist to use that beauty to honor an icon.

Realize is on display at LA Live in downtown Los Angeles until April 9th. See it and be moved.

Taking A Stand

2011-03-28T21:56:00.000-07:00

There were large labor union protests in downtown Los Angeles this past weekend. The only reason I knew about them is because I was walking to a hockey game and streets between my place and Staples Center were blocked off.

I will freely admit I don't devote much time to current events. Besides major elections, I don't participate much in this wonderful democratic society we're privileged to live in. I follow world events mainly through the Internet and never watch my local news. I'm too busy running around, living my life. I don't have time to worry about things I can't control.

I'm a perfect example of the apathy that has gotten this great country where it is today. If I took the time to get involved, while I still might not be in control, I would be a part of the solution, not simply one of the many people complaining about the problem.

When I was in elementary school, my father was part of a transit union that went on strike in Wilmington, Delaware. He went to Washington, DC along with a group of his fellow union members as part of an arbitration committee working to negotiate an end to the strike. I was too young to understand that he wasn't being paid, which made supporting a wife and 3 small children hard. I do remember how passionately he talked with friends and neighbors about the issues he faced, even though I couldn't understand them myself. He was a good citizen and chose to act on what he believed, even though it created hardship for him.

Standing up for what you believe in even when it's hard is exactly the point. This country needs more people motivated to do just that. It's the foundation upon which our democracy was built. My Dad knew it. These folks know it too.

So even though I don't unilaterally support unions, and I don't know enough about the issues of these protesters to decide whether I agree with them or not, I support their right to protest. I admire their determination in speaking up. Change only happens when you show the courage to stand up for what you believe.

Now it's time to figure out what I believe.